What would you name a detective if he didn't already have a name?
Cassie.
Get it?
My friend dreamed of being a porno star.
He did it for 3 months and decided it was not for him.
The next job he got was pumping petrol. Halfway through filling up, he pulled the hose out and started spraying all over the car!
You must work at McDonald's because you have a McDouble chin.
What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed.
You will never be as lazy as whoever named the fireplace.
My job is so amazing.
Today a man asked me to check his balance, so I pushed him over. His balance isn't good.
I get paid more than $200 to $400 per hour for working online. I heard about this job 3 months ago, and after joining this, I have earned easily $30k from this without having online working skills. Simply give it a shot on the accompanying site...
Here is I started.............>> fixpay1.blogspot.com
A 10 year old girl reported to her friends that her 16 year old male babysitter was touching her inappropriately. He quickly lost his job as a babysitter.
A 10 year old boy reported to his friends that his 16 year old female babysitter was touching him inappropriately. She quickly became the most popular babysitter in town amongst boys.
Yo Mama So Ugly When She Entered The Scare Factory She Came Out With a Job Application
Today sucked my girlfriend got hit by a car and I lost my job as an Uber driver
I saw a girl at my job and we ended up fucking, then the test came back and I have hives from my sister.
Why can’t a blind person be a teacher? Because they can’t control their pupils.
Why was the barber mad because I gave him a buzzcut?
Why do women need a pay rise? Isn't the glass ceiling high enough?
Your Mom is so friking fat, that when she ripped her pants and went to the seamster, they said, "We don't sew curtains!"
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? Hold on to your nuts; this ain’t no ordinary blow job.
Kid: How much do you get paid?
Teacher: Minimum wage.
Hey, wanna hear a construction joke?
- Sure.
Oh sorry, I'm still working on it :-]
Who do you call to clean up foul language?
A cuss-todian!
"Dick, you're fired."
"I'd buy that for a dollar."
