IT jokes
You're so short, when it rains you're the last one to know.
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app, and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
What can you break, even if you never pick it up or touch it?
Your mama is so ugly! It took your dad 15 years to return from getting milk.
When your friends [are] talking about sports:
Jake says, "It was 17.56M people watching [the] basketball championship."🦁
Sam says, "It was 113M people watching the Super Bowl." 😯🐱
Avion says, "It was up from 1.12 billion people watching [the] World Cup." 😶🙀
I wanted to make a joke about dandruff.
People are still scratching their heads over it.
Q: Why can't orphans do homework? A: They don't have a home to do it at.
Yesterday I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home.
Why can't orphans work at S. C. Johnson?
Because it's a family company.
Why can't an orphan go to S. C. Johnson?
Because it's family owned.
What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
Q: Why is marriage not a word?
It's a life sentence!
Yo mama is so retarded, they tell her it was gonna be chilly outside, she went and got a bowl!
I made a website about orphans.
Sadly, it doesn't have a home page.
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan?
Because it doesn't have a home button.
Two blondes fell down a hole.
One said, "It's dark in here, isn't it?"
The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see."
I hate double standards.
Burn a body at a crematorium, you’re “being a respectful friend.” Do it at home and you’re “destroying evidence.”
You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friends' noses.
Does it cycle now? 🚲
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course it can, a house can't jump.
You think you guys are funny, but look at your hairline. It be looking like the McDonald's symbol. 😂😂😂😂😭😭💀🤨🍆💦👶🏻😈😈😈😈😈😂😂😂😂😂😂👍😳😳😳😭😭😭😭😭😭🤨