Insult jokes

If you tell me to get a life, you're telling me to get a life better than yours!

You're gay, lol.

Your hairline's so far back, you need binoculars to see it.

Are you made of Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?

'Cause damn, you lookin' kinda Au Ti S Ti C.

Yo mama's so ugly, she could make an onion cry.

Your hairline is so bad, I do your mom so hard!

Roses are red, violets are blue.

Your mom is fat and so are you.

Yo mama is so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.

Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.

Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.

Silence...................punch!

Bully: Shut up.

Me: I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you, I throw up.

You smell!

Brother: Your eyebrows look hella bad.

Sister: I don’t even think you know what eyebrows are supposed to look like because you have none.

"Harry Hicks smells of home. Homo is an infection, and infections are made up of atoms."

Yo mama so fat, she doesn't need internet, because she's already WORLDWIDE!

If an old person tells you what to do just say, "At least my parents are alive!"

Girlfriend: Babe, what do you think of our love?

Me: Look at the stars in the sky.

Girlfriend: Aww... it’s infinity, right?

Me: No, it’s a waste of time.

Girlfriend: I’m breaking up with you.

Me: Whatever, when I take out the trash, I think of you.

I can tell you used to be friends with your hairline, cuz it goes way back.

Are your forehead and hairline friends? 'Cause they go way back.

Would you rather date me or a lady?

I laid deez nuts in your mouth.

Yo mama is Obama.