Weenis long.
What’s the difference between a baby and a beet?
Beets stain your teeth.
My infant drew on the walls today, but I don’t know how to punish them. So I think I’ll sleep on it.
What's the grossest thing ever?
A bag of dead babies.
What's even more gross?
The bottom one is still wriggling!
What is the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
I take off my boots when I jump on a trampoline.
How do you get 500 dead babies into a car?
A blender.
How do you get 500 dead babies out of a car?
A straw.
What’s red and cries?
A skinned baby in a bag of salt.
How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?
You nail its other hand to the ground.
What's worse than 2 dead babies in a trash bin? Two babies in one trash bin.
Q: what is the difference between a pizza and a baby? A: the pizza does not scream when you put it in the oven.
What's better than swinging a baby around on a rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
What is red bubbling and scratching at a window, A baby in the microwave.
Most people smother babies with love.
I smother them with pillows.
What's worse than finding 10 babies in 10 dumpsters?
Finding 1 baby in 10 dumpsters.
What's 10 inches and makes women scream?
Cot death!
What's the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don't set the skeleton on fire.
What do you call a baby with red curry fried hair?
A baby using a potato peeler and a comb.
What's white, red, and screams a lot?
A baby in a blender.
What's hard about walking through a bunch of dead babies?
My dick.
What sits in the corner and gets smaller and smaller? A baby with a potato peeler.
