Incest jokes
So, a daughter goes to her dad and says, "Daddy, can I borrow the car?" He then tells her, "You know what to do." So then she proceeds to suck him off, almost immediately pulls out in disgust, and says, "Ugh, tastes like shit." Her dad then said, "Damn, I forgot your brother took the car."
Kenny is living with his girlfriend now.
He just moved back in with his mom.
Son: Dad, I think I got a girl pregnant.
Dad: Well, is she already part of the family?
Son: Yes, why?
Dad: Then there’s no need to be worried.
So I caught my girlfriend masturbating with a carrot. My first reaction was "Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it’s gonna taste like carrots!"
What's the best part about plowing your cousin?
- It makes your sister jealous.
They'll never do reverse cowgirl because you never turn your back on family.
So, I heard the CEO gave her daughter a really good spot in the company.
Everyone is mad, but I think it just goes to show that it pays to sleep with your boss.
Billy: "I'm so used to having you in bed with me, I don't know if I'm ready for this long-distance relationship."
Sally: "Ohh, don't worry brother, I'll just be right down the hall..."
Only one of Kenny's girlfriends has ever said he's good in bed.
But she has to. She's his mom.
Guys, my sister's pregnant!
I'm finally a dad!
I asked Siri why I am still single; she showed me a pic of my mom riding on my dick!
A woman's husband has a yearly conference. The first night he's away from home, their teenage son Tommy comes into their room at night and starts to make love to her, but she knows that it can be dangerous to wake a sleepwalker, so she doesn't say anything. He does this every night for two weeks and stops when his father comes home.
She realizes she's pregnant and has a baby boy.
The next year the same thing happens, she gets pregnant again, and has a baby girl.
The third year, she's feeling very guilty, and after thirteen nights of incredible passionate lovemaking she sits Tommy down and tells him, "Every time your father leaves town on business, you sleepwalk into my bedroom and make love to me. Bobby and Anna aren't just your brother and sister, you're their father!"
Tommy said "You think I was sleepwalking?"
There are two types of people in Alabama: the orphans and the incests.
Why can't all guys be more like Kenny? He doesn't get all upset when his mom isn't in the mood.
Kenny can't find a girlfriend because neither of his sisters can fuck as good as his mom could.
Q. How does a girl from Alabama know when her mom is on the rag?
A. She can taste it on her brother's cock.
So there I was, fucking my sister, and she shouts, "God, you fuck like Dad!" I then said, "Damn, that’s what Mom said."
Ancestry.com is spelled with an “I” in Alabama.
I hooked up with the groom at my uncle's wedding.
What do you get when you cross a redneck and another redneck?
Incest.