Hows jokes
How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.
How many white police officers does it take to push an African-American gentleman down the stairs?
Push?! He fell...
How did the burglar get into my house?
Intruder window.
Q: How do basketball players stay cool during a game?
A: They stand near the fans! 🏀🏀😆😆
Q: How do you blind a woman?
A: You put a windshield in front of her.
Memes
godd
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don’t find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.
How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?
You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving. IDK.
How many children can you fit in a box?
Maybe five if you have a trash compactor.
The biggest inconvenience in 2001, I thought, was my brother. Turns out it was 9/11. I guess the planes saw him be born and died from how ugly he was. Aluh aluckbar.
How do you keep a blind kid busy? Give him sandpaper and tell him it's a find-a-word. 😂🤣
Mother: How is my little cookie doing?
Doctor: Your cookie is feeling crummy right now.
Mother: Really?
Doctor: But don’t worry. Things are about to get batter.
Mother: 😁♥️🍪
It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
I got a reversible jacket for Christmas, I can't wait to see how it turns out.
How are peppers 🌶 so nosey?
They get jalapeño business.
How do you piss off a disabled person?
You put the cookie on the other shoulder.
I hate how politically correct the world is these days, you can't even say "black paint."
You have to say, "Leroy, please paint that wall!"
Me: Hey, how are you?
Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3
Insomnia: Mommy, can we get a home?
Anxiety: Insomnia, wait for mommy to finish.
Depression: Anyway, here is my resume!
Me: Okie, thank you. Ok... mhmmm... WOW! Okie, this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it...)
Depression: Also, I have two more friends that want to move in too!
Me: Ok, and their names?
Depression: Their names are: PTSD and Trauma!
Me: Ok, they seem fine (Doesn't know about them)
Depression: Okie, here is the money (a penny :(). Thank you, we will call you if we need anything.
Me: Ok, see you soon! :3
Me now hates my life. :)
I don't fuck my mother all day long. I fuck my mother for only 6 hours a day. Sometimes it's 7-8 hours. It depends on how busy my siblings and father are with their work.
How to make time fly?
Answer: Throw a clock out of the window.
How are Tinder and orphans alike?
You swipe left till you find the one you like.