How do you execute Stephen Hawking?
The electric wheelchair.
Howe Jokes
How do you make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles!
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they sit in the dark and cry xdddd.
Some guy interviewed me and asked how it felt to kill thousands of people. I replied, “I don’t know. I’ve only killed communists.”
How do people eat bread?
Milk makes you tall, right?
Well how did you get tall if your dad didn't come back with the milk?
How many emos does it take to fix a light?
I don't know because they never came down.
Hi, how are you?
What did the plane say to the twin towers?
"Lmao, you twins don't know how to play Jenga. Here, let me show you how!" (BOOM) ;)
How did the orphan become famous?
By "go[ing] big or go[ing] home."
So many things are going through my head.
How am I not dead yet?
How did Capetian Hook kill himself? He wiped his butt with the wrong hand.
How many skinny people can fit in a tub? I don't know; they keep slipping down the drain.
A blind man handed me a piece of paper. It said, "⠊⠋ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠉⠁⠝ ⠞⠗⠁⠝⠎⠇⠁⠞⠑ ⠞⠓⠊⠎ ⠽⠕⠥ ⠁⠗⠑ ⠛⠁⠽."
I have no idea how he knew.
How to know something won’t be fun:
Someone will say, "C'mon, it’ll be fun!"
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
Hii! Oh my gosh. It has been forever! How have you guys been? Comment your favorite movie!!!! <3
What did the parents rearrange the furniture to punish a child?
Guess he was a stupid blind motherfucker 🖕 that didn't even know how to use a cane to figure out where they put the furniture.
"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"
"He died."
"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."
(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"
Billy: Hey kid, why are you sad?
Orphan: Oh, I'm waiting for my parents.
Billy: Oh, and how long have you been here?
Orphan: About 200 years.
