History jokes
why are people in japan so slim? because the last time a fatman came, they lost half their population.
Why does Japan not allow little boys to run?
Because the last time a little boy came, Japan lost a state.
What do Drew Bledsoe and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both got taken out by two jets.
I remember my first day back when working at a camp. I was so surprised when the trains arrived.
My Grandpa killed 30 Air Force pilots in WW2. He was a very bad mechanic.
Hitler was talking about how to fight in WW2 when someone sneezed while Hitler was giving a speech, so Hitler yelled, "WHO SNEEZED ROW 1? DID ANYONE SNEEZE?" They said no, and Hitler shot everybody. Same for row 2 & 3, but in row 4 someone nervous said, "Me, I'm sorry." Then Hitler said, "Bless you."
Me traveling back in time to tell Americans there will be a big tsunami on 9/11/2001, and to survive it they have to climb the two tallest buildings in New York.
It's a little known fact that Helen Keller was against teaching deaf people sign language and thought they should be forced to use oral language.
Weird.
Last time I forced somebody into oral, I got arrested.
What do Civil War veterans and pedophiles have in common?
They both prefer Minnie (mini) balls.
What is the difference between a black man and Jew?
One was born burnt.
What is the difference between Black people and coal?
It’s bad for the environment to burn coal.
What is the difference between Kanye and Hitler?
Hitler knew when his career was over.
What do you call a crowd of horny white women?
Cotton waiting to be picked.
Why do people hit their electronics when they don’t work?
You keep the tradition of hitting black things.
Why do Native Americans hate snow?
Because it's white and on their land.
How do you know Adam and Eve were white?
Have you ever tried taking a rib from black women?
What do Nike and the KKK have in common?
They both make Black people run faster.
If you are what you eat,
why is Jeffrey Dahmer white?
When and where was the biggest BBQ ever?
Hiroshima, Japan 1946.
Nah, I'm Hawaiian but I'm also Japanese. So does that mean I bombed my own harbor?