HI jokes
Why did the duck cross the road to get to his quack dealer?
My boyfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of his Honda Civic, but I refused. If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.
My science teacher was talking about natural selection.
At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.
If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."
Why did Stephen Hawking die so soon?
Because his misses bought the wrong batteries.
Your mama is so fat, when Thanos snapped his finger, she only lost weight.
Memes
Stephen Hawking said he wants other physicists to follow in his footsteps.
Hey, pass me that crowbar, please.
Sure... y’know, before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.
Why did the rapper take a bath before his concert?
To get his flow SQUEAKY CLEAN!
How does a rapper stay cool?
He drops some ICE in his rhymes.
Why was the rapper always late?
Because he had to drop his kids off at the Rhyme Bus.
How do you know if a rapper is lying?
His rhymes don't add up.
Why did the rapper carry a notebook everywhere?
To jot down his RAP-SODIES.
There will be better punchlines at BlessedBrian’s FUNERAL than in his JOKES.
Why did the DJ go to therapy?
Because he had too many issues with his TURNTABLE.
I’d tell BlessedBrian to aim for the stars, but it seems like his GRAVITATIONAL PULL is holding him back.
Kris is so dumb that his smartwatch went to NIGHT SCHOOL.
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
For some sick DRIZZLE on his tracks.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To learn how to drop some KNOWLEDGE on his tracks.
Why did the rapper become a weatherman?
To predict the HEAT of his next single.
They say the only curves Daveon likes are on his credit card statements.