HI jokes

President Joseph Biden said during the first presidential debate of the 2024 presidential election that he does not debate as well as he used to. Mr. Biden also can't think as well as he used to either, but then again when Mr. Biden was a United States senator in the state of Delaware he never could think because thinking was never one of his strengths and that is the reason why Mr. Biden became President Obama's vice president in the first place.

Oh well, that's politics.

So, this woman woke up since she had a bad dream and was yelling about her bad dream. Then, in the bed, her husband woke up and said, "Hey! You just woke me up in a sweet dream!" She said, "Oh, sorry babe." Then she asked him what his dream was about, and he responded like, "I was with a woman; me and her was in the middle of dreamy sex; you just ruined it!" She said, "AAAAh!" He asked her what her dream was about, then she replied as, "I was trying to suck a man's penis, and a cock trying to get cummiee out of it!"

How does Hitler tie his shoes?

Into little Nazis.

My dad told me a story today. His mom, my grandma, said if a bird gets in your house, someone will die.

That day, a hummingbird got in his UPS truck, and that’s the day he found out that my grandma had cancer. 😭😭😭😭😭 6 weeks later, she died. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid Blanket?

What would you call a cover for your cock?

Why did the man fall off his bike?

Because someone threw a refrigerator at him.

Stephen Hawking didn’t die naturally, his carer just forgot to put him on charge.

What did the trumpet say to Trump?

"Hi, fellow trumpet!"

Stephen Hawking only died because he tried to install Windows 10, and his hard drive corrupted.

Hi, you guys don't know me, but I have my best interests at heart.

I'm a kind person who wants to put a stop to the bullying. I think that Gwen, Addison Banks, Watersharky, ect. are kind people! Also, I kinda like Watersharky...

Bob: Siri, call 666!

*dialing noises*

Bob: Hello?

Bob's dad: Hi!

Hi, my name isn't Pi.

Look up at the sky and wonder why.

Why are you alive?

Zion is so fat that his dick can't even fit in his wife's pussy.

Two people about to have sex realize they have no lube.

In their desperate, horny haste, they looked for the nearest "Downy" and asked it, "Speak into my hand."

Upon their return to the bed, they regretted it immediately because his dick just stayed down...

Hi, I'm Bob.

His face.

Why did the man cross the road?

Because his dick was stuck in the chicken!

"He scratched his face up, detective. That did it."

"Did I do that?"

My grandfather has the heart of a lion!! 🦁

In a jar on his desk along with a lifetime ban from the zoo...

VOTING SEMIFINAL 2

LIKE: When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it’s a Disco party. 🕺🕺🕺

DISLIKE: When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say “This boy always had a fat ass”.

Vote for the better joke.