HI jokes
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He rolled away and his charger unplugged.
The orphan wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.
How does an orange 🍊 go into a crowded restaurant?
By squeezing his way in.
Q: Why did Little Johnny drop his ice cream?
A: Because he got hit by a bus.
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap?
"There's a great singer inside of you."
Memes
What were my final words to Putin before I put a bullet through his head?
Answer: Putin, put out!
Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.
He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.
Guy: Hi, how was your day today?
Woman: Good!
Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant*
Guy: How many months pregnant are you?
Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also, I’m not pregnant.
What did the Mexican firefighter name his two sons?
Jose and Hose B.
How many letters are in the English Alphabet?
Twenty-two. ET went home, P ran down his leg, and he took ME with him.
What did the big rose say to the little rose?
"Hi, bud!"
I walk up to a kid. I ask where his parents are, and he started crying. Then I walked out of the orphanage.
Like Markgeraldnasol and his Pokemon Jokes.
What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
Billy: Dad, I was shot by a sniper!
Dad: Uh...
*hides his rifle*
Why would an orphan kill his family? Because they weren't there.
Why did the wither skeleton fail his test?
Because his answers were netherrite.
My grandpa lost his toe today. 😔
Nvm, we found it. It's in his TOEtruck.
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her? She found another woman's lipstick on his knuckles.
I saw a little kid crying today. I asked where his parents were, and he started to cry more. I left the orphanage to get some milk after that.
If you have a bad day, go tell an orphan to find his parents. He will be searching all day.