HI jokes
When your brother sends you to go get a box of condoms for his b-day. (* *)
Who’s more excited than a kid on his birthday?
Jimmy Savile in a primary school playground.
One day I walk up to an emo kid. I realized he had a fresh cut, so I grab my hand and slap his wrist and told him, "I like ya cut, G!"
A kid goes to bed with his dad because he’s scared of the dark. Turns out he just wanted to have sex.
How do you know when Kobe Bryant is famous?
His face was chiseled in a mountain.
Memes
I bullied a handicap today.
What is he gonna do? Stand up for himself?
Sad to think about legend O.G. Mudbone being no longer with us.
I’m only curious how they closed his casket.
Hi 👋 I was wondering...
When your uncle drops a nickel, but the only thing he really drops is his pants.
Why did the man with no arms fall off his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him.
Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they all said, "Bach, Bach, Bach!"
How did the skeleton know it was gonna rain?
If you said he felt it in his bones, you're wrong. He watched the weather forecast.
Why can you punch an orphan and get away with it?
Because what is he gonna do, tell his parents?
Guy feels something on his back.
“Oh God, please let that be a rifle.”
“Nope. I’m just real happy to see you.”
What do you call a Mexican that lost his car?
Car-los
I love you.
What's the difference between a toaster and a ten-year-old Chinese girl? A Japanese soldier would regret sticking his d*ck into a toaster.
I saw a dad shave his daughter's head because she made fun of a woman with cancer.
Good thing she didn’t make fun of a pregnant woman 🤭
Why did the chicken cross the road?
He forgot his eggs.
Why was Stephen Hawking disappointed when he got his Christmas present? It was singing lessons.