Herring jokes

I told this knock knock joke to Helen Keller...

Me: Knock Knock

Her:

There's only one reason our Education Minister is standing by this curriculum.

In her religion, you NEVER pull out.

Me and my wife love playing table tennis. I couldn’t win all day, but when it got dark, I managed to beat her. I don’t know how the police found out so quickly.

Ur momma's so fat that when she became a spy her codename was OObese.

Everyone at the Queen's funeral:

Me and the boys getting her reboot card.

Yo mama so fat, her birth certificate was an apology letter.

Hey, my sister said you're Mattick, so I decided to swim with her and she threw a ball at me, so I went to my dad and she said, "Why did you tell dad?" She was crying because I’m not getting a car seat.

Why is Chloe's forehead so big? Because her forehead is king-size.

What did the tree do to the emo? Left her hanging.

I did this to my ex. I stole her wheelchair. I knew she would come crawling back.

She’s got 20 dudes in her DMs telling her she is pretty. Stand out, call her ugly.

My uncle died on 9/11. Her last words were "Allahu Akbar."

Who likes Fortnite? Gwen Stacy is in the game, let's goooooo! I love her!

So a lady came up to me today at the bank, and she asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

What's the similarity between your mum and West Ham?

Your mum blows spunk bubbles from her ass.

If Sakura's head looks like earth, then her hairline has to look like the Milky Way.

I was hit by a car. Later, my ex lost her bus job.

Your momma so fat she can feed [the] entire continent of Africa with her fat!

You look like the type of guy to wash his/her hands after a shower! (And don't write in the comments that there are more than 2 genders.)

I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and I’m so angry about her lies.

She is not “fun to be around.”