Herring jokes
Your mum is so fat that when she sat on the toilet, she couldn't because her fat ass can't fit on the toilet seat.
What did the mother cheetah say to her cub?
"Go to bed or I'll slap your spots off you!"
Your mama so old, her first Christmas was the first Christmas!
Your momma's so dumb, she took her driving lesson on a dinosaur.
Wow, Aiden, maybe you've been mean to Tenya. She is hurting, close to killing herself, but hey, I can pick your ass since, ya know, that is what I do!
Memes
Damn.....
Yo mama so fat that she needs her belly button to beat her home by 15 min.
Your mama so fat, Jupiter is smaller than her.
He placed the chocolates and the flowers down beside her.
Silence...
And then at last she spoke...
"Unexpected item in the bagging area."
Why did Mrs. Henderson get a divorce from her husband, Harry?
She was tired of everyone calling the family "Hairy" and the Hendersons.
So I went to the bank and a lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her over.
I work at a bank and an old woman asked me to check her balance.
So I pushed her over.
My wife accused me of cheating. I told her she started to sound like my wife.
My daughter is super smart! She pours her own drinks on the floor.
What’s the difference a hooker an a drug dealer...?? A hooker can wash her crack an resell it.
Yo mama so dumb, when the doctor told her she had coronavirus, she bought a new laptop.
Yo mama so ugly, just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yes, let's go bury it."
Yo mama is so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.
Yo mama so old, she walked into an antique store, and they didn't let her leave.
The police officer in London, who used fake Covid rules to arrest a young woman, drive her more than 50 miles out of London in a hire car, murder her, and do whatever to her, has appealed against his Whole Life tariff.
He should be relieved it was only that! Could've been worse... could've married her!
My mom telling me the brief history of the blanket and how she received it from her cousin. ( ╹▽╹ )
Me sitting anxiously in place pretending to be amazed by the story, and reacting with kind cheerfulness and a big smile. (◍•ᴗ•◍)
All I can actually think about: "I m@sturbated under it- aaaaaah" ಠ◡ಠ