Herring jokes

I dated a German girl, it was very annoying when she kept on screaming her age and moaning.

My ex's dad died while she was texting me. She said she had a boyfriend, but I told her I had a dad.

Yo momma so fat, I took a photo of her last year and it's still printing.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.

Jack got high and slapped his thigh and said, "You know you wanna."

Jill said yes, picked up her dress and said, "Let's have some fun!"

Silly ole Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.

Why did the orphan girl cry during sex?

Because her boyfriend said "Who's your daddy?"

BAJAHAHAHHAA

Your mum is so fat, all her relationships are long distance.

There was a girl called Millie, and she had sexy blond hair, and she wanted to chase me, but I told her she had to catch me first if she loves me.

How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing?

Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.

Your mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale the doctor asked for her weight, not her phone number.

Yo mama so fat, when she falls, they have to call 999 and a crane to pick her up.

Wayne Couzens, the police officer who killed Sarah Everard, has been complaining about receiving a whole life tariff for her murder...

I think he should count his blessings. He could have had it worse...

He could have married her!

An emo girl dyed her hair red.

Where does her hairline start? Her wrist.

Nana when Zane kisses her in her mind: [Insert Chiwawa Scream!]

I said to the emo girl, "She gets jealous every time her phone dies."

If a woman says she needs to set boundaries between you and her, you would be crossing it if you are a Mexican.

Yo mama is so fat that when she is about to put her foot on the scale, the scale begs for mercy.

Your mama is so fat, even God couldn't raise her spirit.

My wife told me she was fat and depressed. She asked me to compliment her, so I said, "You have perfect eyesight!"

One day, during lunch, a Spanish kid came up to my other friend and asked her questions in Spanish, and when she was about to say something, I popped out and said, “GO AWAY OR I WILL SUE YOU WITH BRIANNA’S SEVEN/7 LAWYERS!!!!(AKA, her seven/7 shoes.)”

Stupid Mary Jane was swinging on the swing.

Her momma said, "Stupid Mary Jane, don't swing so high, the boys will see your underwear!"

Stupid Mary Jane laughed and laughed. She knew she wasn't wearing no underwear.