Have jokes
Man with cancer: How much time do I have left?
Doctor: Ten.
Man: Weeks? Months? Days?
Doctor: Nine, eight, seven...
What do an orphan and an apple not have in common?
The apple actually gets picked.
Why was Stephen Hawking always like this 🫠?
Because he didn’t have emojis on his computer.
Why do orphans like pedos? Because they have someone to call "daddy."
Can't have a smoke with my girl after sex, she's asthmatic.
Plus, she's too young to smoke.
Did Mary Have a Little Lamb?
Is "butt check" one word, or do I have to spread it?
Why do women only use their left arm? Because they don’t have rights.
Why does Saturn have a ring?
Because God liked it, so he put a ring on it.
Why can’t orphans go to daughter and dad dance night? They don’t have a dad to go with.
If orphans made phones, it wouldn't have a home button.
Have you seen Dolly Parton's new shoes? Neither has she!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high, grabbed Jill's thigh, and said, "I know you wanna."
Jill said yes, lifted up her dress, and then they had some fun, but silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
What do orphans and dinosaurs have in common?
Their parents are extinct.
Ur mom.
Oh wait, you don't have one.
Riddle: I can fill a room, others can have me, but I can't be shared. What am I?
Answer: Loneliness.
I must have at least 87 years of bad luck; every time I look in the mirror, it breaks!
What do an orphan's parents and the Predator have in common?
They are both invisible.
I gave an orphan an iPhone XR because it does not have a home button.
I take all my anger out on orphans. Why?
Because they have no parents to run to.
Mom: They say our kid neighbor has blue blood.
Son: Really?
Also 2 hours later:
Son: Mom, the kid doesn't have blue blood.
Mom: Son, I-