Haircut jokes
What can run, be an eyesore, and practice social distancing?
Your hairline.
What's the most expensive haircut?
Chemotherapy.
Friends, who's your barber? They mess up big time.
Me.
You're just jealous because my dad cuts my hair for free, and you have to be paying 30 dollars just for that short-ass cut.
What's the best haircut?
Chemotherapy.
A kid went and got a haircut. The day after, he went to school, and a friend says, "I like your cut." He replies, "Which one?"
Who did a barber win a race?
He knew a short cut.
"Dad, did you get a haircut?"
"No, I got them all cut!"
I wish my hair was depressed.
Cause then it would cut itself.
Michael J. Fox goes in to get a haircut. He comes out missing an ear.
Someone walked into a cancer ward and asked for a skin fade.
I asked my friend, "Hey, did you get a haircut?" and she said, "No." Then I'm like, "Really? Then why are you bald today?"
I like your cut, G.
*Slaps really hard*
BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
So this guy named Andrew Furda was my boyfriend for like a half a week, so five days. Then bam, I cut my hair. He only liked me for my looks, and I hoped he regrets it because it is WAR, so if you see this, you're going down, Andrew!
What do you call a fucked up mullet? A fullet.
What's the most expensive haircut in the world?
Chemotherapy.
Site nearly as dead as my trim.
Yo mama so hairy that she got a haircut and lost 47 pounds.
I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut, g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g”.
What do you call shaving a crazy sheep? -- Shear madness.
Why does Sophia have no ears? Her mom gave her, her first haircut.