HA jokes

What’s the difference between a pornstar covered in slime and The White Stripes?

One has "Icky Thump," and the other does "icky hump."

My grandfather has been through a lot in his time. When he was in the war, he survived a mustard gas attack. And later down the line, he survived being pepper sprayed by the police. He was certainly a real seasoned veteran.

They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well, apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.

What do you call a hippo that has been thrown in a pan?

Hippo-POT-amus!

So last week I gave my blind friend a cheese grater. The next two weeks he told me that was the most violent book he has ever read.

What’s fat, brown, and has no dad?

Ama

Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan?

Because it has no home button.

I was walking down the streets with my parents and my sister. My mum said, "Step on a crack, break your mother's back." I stepped on a crack. My sister has been in the hospital ever since.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because she was crummy.

What did the toilet say to the other toilet? You look flushed.

What has 1 head, 1 foot, and 4 legs? A bed.

What's the difference between Mars and Africa? Mars has water.

Q: Why did the orphan buy an iPhone X?

A: Because it has no home button.

What month has 28 days?

All of them.

(Only Ninjago fans understand XD)

If you look outside and it's really windy, it's really cloudy, and the sky looks greenish... you better run, 'cause it has to be Morro!

What animal has more lives than a cat?

A frog. It croaks every night.

What is a difference between a tree, a tree house, that has to be the difference between a tree 🌲 from the tree house that has a difference in a tree tree house that is yuyi?

Yo mama is so ugly, she is the reason Slenderman has no eyes.

Once my cat was playing video games. I was OVERWATCHing him.

I asked him to PAWS the game. He then hissed at me. I was surprised; he usually has a good PURRsonality. He said he YARNED to play the game.

"What's 9 + 10?"

"21" (lol XD)

Also:

"My name Jeff" (Roar XD)

One more thing:

Ninja has ligma.

What's the difference between me and my best friends?

At least one of us has a house.

http://zebrahumor.wordpress.com has more zebra jokes.