What is your favorite name?
Amy has.
Stephanie has a great thumb!
Ha, gay!
What show has something orphans will never have?
American Dad!
When an orphan is playing baseball, how come the coach doesn't tell them to hit it home?
He has no home to hit to.
Any food an orphan has is a family-sized meal.
What's the difference between a knife and me?
One has a point.
Did you hear Stephen Hawking has a new book out?
It's about time!
Why can't an orphan have sex?
Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."
Have you ever seen a blind man swim?
No.
Neither has he.
Sans: What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
Sans: ha ha ha ha!!
Ha, gay!
When that one night stand says she has AIDS but you laugh, "I choose D!"
She says...wait what?? I have all of the above! XD
Pierre Poilievre has lost the government position he had for 20 years.
Bet he wishes his mom HAD used that coat hanger.
So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.
Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.
Anyways, she cried lol.
What do you get when you mix an apple with water... applesauce. Wait, do not leave yet. If you are still reading this, you have been rekt, ha ha. At least I am still laughing.
What do you call a Down syndrome kid who has been physically abused by older teenagers and her parents for a total of 16 years and has red marks all over their body?
Not funny because Down syndrome jokes aren't funny ;)
A man is out west driving and on the edge of town comes across a tourist stand and sitting in front is an Indian chief right out of central casting. Dour look, full headdress, a glass jar and a sign that says "Indian chief know all! $5". So the fellow's curiosity gets the better of him and he goes up to the chief, puts $5 in the jar and asks "What did I have for breakfast on this day 10 years ago?" Chief taps his chin for a moment and says "Hmmm eggs. You had eggs!"
"Eggs?" shouts the guy "Everybody has eggs! I've been had!" throws his hands in the air and leaves in a huff.
Ten years on, as fate would have it the fellow has occasion to be driving through the same town and sure enough he comes across the same stand, Indian chief, sign, and jar. So he stops the car and saunters across the road, goes up to the chief like a smart-ass, holds up his hand and says "How". Chief taps his chin for a moment and says "Poached."
My dog has no nose.
How does he smell?
Terrible!
Why did the Mexican man throw his wife out of the window...
Ta kill her.
