My guy: I have a Q-Tip
Me: You can q my tip
My guy: Ayo
Guy: Whose place? Mine or yours? Girl: Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.
I went to the tattoo shop and asked for a skull. A jewish guy behind me said “a skull? Back in my day, we could only get numbers.”
what do you call a black guy on a moon?
YOU RACISTS An astronaut !
"I work with animals," a guy says to his date. "That's so sweet," she replies. "I love a man who cares about animals. Where do you work?" "I'm a butcher," he replies.
I just read that someone in New York gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor guy.
One knight a guy asked his wife were she wanted to eat she said Chinese food so he flew her to china the next night he asked her what she wanted to eat she said Indian food so he flew her to India the last night he said what do you want to eat and she said she wanted nothing so he flew her to Africa
One day a man buys a rope to suicide, but his friend stops him. They go to a school with lots of happy kids. The guy feels better after a mag.
What is an orphans most hated tv shows Family guy & American dad
One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card and we live far and we my mom was hungry. A guy and his friend had a car and k us if we were lost. We said no we have no ride, no money and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each so I was driving the car and my mom gave the both guys a blowjob. We had to get out the car to look for something then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I ask what the bad news that they're not taking us home so I ask what the good news they told me that they feed my mom and drove off. I guess where we i guess the left us wsnt long walk and my mom wasm't hungry no more.
Guy 1: How far are we going?
Guy 2: About as far as somebody's miscarriage.
Do you know that no one finds Hitler a great guy? But he really saved the History Channel.
Look, Bono is a great guy. But shopping with him is a pain, because he still hasn't found what he is looking for.
Did you hear about the guy that posts all of the "Hairline Jokes"?
Answer; Yeah, he's a COMPLETE IDIOT!
Why is it okay for a woman to use me when she feels like it but when I use her body when I feel like it I am the bad guy?
What makes you guys high? I get high when I have a dead fish in my lunchbox.
*True story* I saw his guy with a very bad hairline who was painting himself blue and it said smurf paint but I shouted MEGAMIND
What's an orphan's least favorite film? Family Guy.
Hey guys! just a reminder that the guy below me is a crying bitch! have a good day!
Why the fuck is this guy calling me a crying bitch...
