Newest Google Jokes - Page 5 - Worst Jokes Ever

This is NOT my joke i found it on google its a texting joke Mom:Son youre grandma just passed away LOL Son:mom what do you mean LOL that means laughing out loud Mom:oh no i thought that meant lots of love i have to text everyone back!!!!

What do cheap people use to talk?

Free speech.

china unban google rn noOoOooOw

Riddles not jokes

What has 4 legs but cannot walk?

What has bark but no bite?

There's a one-story house in which everything is orange. Orange walls, orange doors, orange furniture. What color are the stairs?

What has holes but can carry water?

What is in front of you, but cannot be seen?

What is something you have inside you that is pink, but cannot be seen?

What can you catch but not throw?

and last one

What can rule, but not command?

Tell meh the answers in the comments

like 90% of this was from this link: https://parade.com/947956/parade/riddles/

1 more thing: DoN"t google it or search it up, use ur brain to answer these.

Note to self.

When baking for the holidays don't Google creampies.

Google cream pie recipes.

Is Google a girl or a boy?

Obviously a Girl, because it won't let you finish a sentence without making a suggestion.

Your grandmother died cuz she fell on the highest floor of the hotel your grandfather died cuz he got shot by saving your mother if he didn't save your mother you wouldn't be here You grew up in a world full of virus you wanted the virus to be gone there's only one way But you have to know it I can't tell it for you Your mother got the Covid-19 you prayed and prayed all night hoping that she would be okay the next day the doctors went to your house without your mother you asked "Where is my mother?!?!" The doctors said "Your mother is gone,so we came here to tell you" the doctors left. Anither hour you were thinking while crying "Why was my pray not working?,Lord why'd you let me down?" You searched on Google "How to bring back the dead" the Google workers declined it.your father left you cuz he loved another girl Your brothers are still with you but what do they get the virus? Who will be with you? Don't forget Jesus is still there for you don't give up keep going and you will succeed soon you will find your own family and beat the coronavirus

when a kinderX=MsgBox("you do not have permission to delete this item",2+64,"error")the abcsgarten teacher askes a kid to sing alphabet he said ab3defg teacher said do you like 3d he said yeah teacher yelled ok do you have a3ds yeah he said teacher goes ito his bag and sais say abcs or your 3ds will be destroyed he says ab3defghijlmnopqrs oh he learned well the teacher thrw the 3ds out the window the kid gets it and it still wirks then he googles abcs it goes to youtube and says abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz teacher is proud of the 3ds the class went home tekll ing pa

tech administrator of a school: hm, a message from google security? tech administrator of a school: OH SHIT! assistant: WHAT, WHAT, TELL ME? tech administrator of a school: WEVE BEEN COMPROMISED, WE FORGOT TO SECURE THE SITE! assistant: OK, OK, THE KEY IS NOT TO PANIC... let's call the school board

A FEW MOMENTS LATER

head of school board: HAHAHAHAHAHA! that's a good one, almost as good as the one with jack, jill, and the ripped condom! HAHAHAHAHAHA tech administrator of a school: HAHAHA yeah I know right *whispers* you are playing it cool, right? head of school board: *whispers* yeah were fucked...

TWO HOURS LATER

important fat people in one room: OH FUCK OH NO, HELP PLEASE!!!!! WAIT, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TELL THE PARENTS ABOUT THEIR STOLEN INFORMATION!!!

AND SO THAT WAS THE BIRTH OF RIOTING TEACHER