Go Jokes

I love eating pussy. That’s why the animal shelter is always my go-to for a good meal.

Where did JFK go in his car? I am not sure of his intentional destination, but he did go everywhere.

Today, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the residents if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.

My parents are the worst.

I told my psychiatrist I was going to go kill myself. He asked if I was paying for this appointment in check or cash.

My mom wanted me to build her a shed for her useless things, then she told me to go live in it.

Why don't black people go on cruises? They're not falling for that one again.

What is the difference between Batman and a black man?

Batman can go out at night without Robin.

I just wanted to say to never let go of family; they are everything. Never let anyone walk all over you. And if you are with me, like this quote.

you play gatcha life more like go get a life.

A Down syndrome kid asks for an ice cream. The man asks, "Do you want sauce on it?"

The kid says, "It doesn’t matter, I’m going to drop it anyway!" 😂😂😂

Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don't have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan: he tells his friend, "We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks. But then when the bill comes, you get down and suck on the hot-dog, and it'll look like you're sucking on my dick. So then we'll get thrown out without paying, and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again."

His friend agrees, so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude's pants, go to the bar, and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, "Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!" The first guy says, "Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!"

A guy is sitting at a bar when a drunk man walks up to him, calling his mom a whore. The guy just ignores it and stays in his spot drinking his beer. An hour goes by and the drunk man comes back saying, "Your mom is a whore!" The guy sitting looks around the bar, sees people staring and says, "Don't worry, everything is cool here," and shrugs it off. After a few more shots, the drunk man walks up a third time and says, "Your mom... is such... a whore!" The guy finally gets mad, throws his fist on the table and says, "You know what? Go home Dad!"

Jack and Molly are sitting in school one day. Molly is asleep when the teacher asks her a question, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?”

Jack sees Molly is sleeping and quickly pokes her with a sharp pencil.

“Jesus Christ almighty!” shouts Molly.

“Correct,” says the teacher.

The next day the teacher asks, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?”

Molly is again asleep and is poked by Jack’s pencil.

“Jesus Christ almighty!” she shouts.

“Correct again,” says the teacher.

The next day, for a 3rd time, Molly is asleep.

This time the teacher asks her, “What did Eve say to Adam when she had so many children?”

Jack pokes Molly with the pencil again, and this time Molly screams “If you stick that thing in me one more time I’m going to crack it in half!”

Two cows standing in a paddock, one says, "Moo." The other turns to him and says, "I was just going to say that!"

After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he’ll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to go and have some fun.

Silly Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son.

A child asks his teacher to go to the toilet.

"Before you go, recite the alphabet," the teacher says.

"a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z"

"Good, but where's the p?"

"Running down my leg."

Roses are red, shit is brown, Get that dick out my ass so we can go to town.

Home Covid Test.

1: Open a can of beer and try to smell it.

2: If you can smell the beer, drink it to see if you can taste it.

3: If you can taste it and smell it, this confirms you don't have Covid.

Last night, I did the test 15 times and all were negative. Tonight I am going to do the test again because this morning I woke up with a headache and feeling like I am coming down with something.

I am so nervous.