Girls jokes
Boy/girl: I love you.
Me: I love me too! But sorry, my mom said I can't date trash. Go back to the trashcan.
The boy/girl: I- *Is depressed*
If a girl is vegan and she's dating a transgender person, does that mean she's eating fake meat too?
A panda goes to see a hooker. He goes down on her, he mates with her, he ejaculates and then he attempts to walk away.
The working girl asks, "Aren't you going to pay me?"
She opens the dictionary to "Prostitute: One who sells sexual companionship for money."
The panda picks up the dictionary and turns to the definition "Panda: A marsupial who eats, roots, shoots, and leaves."
This disabled girl started rolling after me, so I ran to the stairs.
Girl: "Come over."
Orphan: "I can't."
Girl: "My parents aren't home ;)"
Orphan: "Oh cool, something we have in common."
A professional golfer driving his Porsche picked up an Irish girl hitchhiker. He had his golfing gear on the back seat. The Irish girl picked up something and asked, "What are these?"
"Those are tees," he said. "I rest my balls on them when I drive."
"Wow!" said the girl. "What will those car makers think of next!"
Girl: "Come over."
Orphan: "I can't."
Girl: "My parents aren't home ;)"
Orphan: "Just two things I don't have."
A girl named Ranch went to the store and stayed there. Why? Because she was ranched!
What do teenage girls and happy meals have in common?
They both come with a toy.
Why are girls and rocks so alike?
If they're flat, they get skipped.
I met an amazing girl online. Smart, sexy... uninhibited.
Of course it turned out to be a 12 year old paraplegic boy... I have to admit... The sex was disappointing.
What's the difference between depression and a girl?
XXXTentacion can't seem to beat depression.
The emo girl got jealous that her phone died and not her.
A boy and a girl are showering together. The girl looks down and says to the boy, "Hey, can I touch it?" The boy replies, "Oh hell nah. You already ripped yours off."
What does Joe Biden say to young girls when he leaves the room?
"Smell ya later!"
What do you call a white girl having a seizure? A vanilla shake.
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because it was a very large mammal; its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to Heaven, I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to Hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."
If you drop an apple and an emo girl, who falls first?
The apple, because the emo girl hung herself.
Explain Bear, girl, you're tripping.
Boy: *scares girl*
Girl: "Gosh, you scared me, Jesus!"
Jesus: *Arrives out of nowhere and said, "What is it, human? I got work to do."*
Girl: What work?
Jesus: "Coming out of nowhere when people say 'Jesus.'"