Germany jokes

Hitler isn’t really a bad guy, after all, he did kill Hitler himself.

Why did Hitler never go to a strip club?

He hated the Poles.

What did the German Shepherd dog say to Hitler?

"Mein Führer ist steckenbleiben in meinen Zähnen."

How tall does the grass grow in Germany?

Zis high!

If Germany is the father land, and Russia is the mother land, would WWII just be domestic violence?

My grandpa was amazing. He killed Hitler.

Why did Germany win World War Two? Wait—that's not right... um... excuse me while I look up who won the war...

*disconnected*

What is Hitler's favorite food? A hindenburger.

"Popcorn" means "Photo-Oxidant formation by Plant-emitted Compounds and OH Radicals in Northeastern Germany."

"HO" means a woman, in particular one who has many casual sexual encounters or relationships. So basically, popcorn is a woman in plant based sex encountered a lot in a nazi camp.

Why did Hitler lose the war?

Because Göring ate every last airplane, tank, artillery, ship, and ammunition!

Why did England beat Germany in World War Two?

Scissors beat paper.

Germany is...

What is the one sauce Germans avoid on their steak?

"Ajous".

Why did Adolf Hitler like nuts? He only had one.

Why does Hitler drink milk? Because he doesn't like juice.

I was going from Germany to Austria, and I accidentally crossed the border illegally. When the police caught me, they told me I was a Nazi. I asked them, "Why?" They said I didn't see the border.

The nearest approximation to a perpetuum mobile would be a Swabian chasing a Scot because of money.

(Swabians are the Scots of Germany regarding finances.)

Did you hear about the new German microwave? It has ten seats in it.

Question: How bad is German WiFi?

Answer: It's the wurst.

Germany: As long as America stays out of the war, we should win.

Japan: *bombing Pearl Harbor* Cowabunga It Is!!