Why is the USA so bad at chess?
Because they already lost two towers.
I've been trying to use Google Maps in Ukraine, but I couldn't because I only saw Russia.
Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.
People: Stop invading Ukraine!
Putin: Ukraine? you mean Mykraine.
An American bully goes up to an English kid and says, "You're ugly!"
And the English kid says, "Well, wanna know why you can't play Jenga?"
"Why?" says the bully.
"Because you haven't got a tower."
Why is Russia invading Ukraine?
«Мы хотим вернуть Советский Союз!»
Why is America so bad at chess?
They lost both of their towers.
What is the difference between a comedian and a clown?
A comedian leads Ukraine, and a clown leads America.
Why does Japan not allow little boys to run?
Because the last time a little boy came, Japan lost a state.
Russia—the real joke.
Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale?
They already lost 2 towers.
Honestly, Ukraine is just built to annoy Russia.
Israel and Palestine jokes are hard at these times.
It’s all about execution.
What's the difference between a Palestinian and SpongeBob's Sandy Cheeks?
One is living in a bubble, the other one in rubble.
An American and a Russian are talking. The American says, "We in America have the best democracy. We can stand in front of the White House and shout with impunity: \"The American President is a moron!\""
"We can do that too," says the Russian, walking with the American to the Kremlin and shouting: "The American President is a moron!"
What are Russia's favorite netball positions?
Goal Shooter and Wing Attack.
Why don't Japanese people like iPhones?
Because they are afraid of American airdrops.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because North Korea's long-range missiles can't reach that far.
Wanna know how I got away from Iraq? Iran.
In America, you fight Ukraine.
In Soviet Russia, you fight Mykraine.
