Footwear jokes
What鈥檚 an orphan鈥檚 least favorite shoe?
Fuller House馃槀
What's the difference between soccer and a dead baby?
I don't wear steel cap boots when I play soccer.
Q: What do kidnappers and rapists have in common?
H: It's similar to shoes.
A: White Vans.
What do you call a shoe made out of a banana?
A slipper.
What's a kidnapper's favorite shoes?
White vans.
What type of sandals do frogs wear?
Open-toed.
What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?
"I wanna sock in the eye so bad!"
What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?
I wanna sock you in the eye so bad!
what kind of shoes are made of banana peels? slippers.
What's a paedophile's favorite footwear?
White Vans.
What song do you think was playing at the school?
"Pumped Up Kicks"
What do frogs wear for shoes? Open toad.
What does your mom say to you? "Love you, moody."
What do you call a person with a hole in their shoe?
A Christian.
What is the difference between snow boots on Earth Day, today, after dinner, and walking home?
What is the difference between snow boots and snow boots and walk home?
I'm starting a clown shoe store.
It's no small feat! :oD
What is the difference between the snow boots on a day today, but you have the one was the night you were coming tomorrow? I can get home night time for.
Q: How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?
A: He gave her a ring.
Q: What鈥檚 the most popular video game at the bread bakery?
A: Knead for Speed.
Q: Why is Santa good at karate?
A: He has a black belt.
Q: Where do werewolves buy Christmas gifts?
A: Beast Buy.
Q: What did the snowflake say to the road?
A: Let鈥檚 stick together.
Q: Why did the turkey join a band?
A: So he could use his drumsticks.
Q: What鈥檚 a math teacher鈥檚 favorite winter sport?
A: Figure skating.
Q: Where do werewolves buy Christmas gifts?
A: Beast Buy.
Q: What did the snowflake say to the road?
A: Let鈥檚 stick together.
Q: Why did the turkey join a band?
A: So he could use his drumsticks.
Q: What鈥檚 a math teacher鈥檚 favorite winter sport?
A: Figure skating.
Q: What鈥檚 a firefly鈥檚 favorite dance?
A: The glitterbug.
Q: Why are eyeshadow, lipstick, and mascara never mad at each other?
A: Because they always make-up.
Q: Where do roses sleep at night?
A: In their flowerbed.
Q: Why was the shoe bad at gymnastics?
A: She was a flip-flop.
Q: What should you wear to a tea party?
A: A t-shirt.
Q: What鈥檚 rain鈥檚 favorite accessory?
A: A rainbow.
Q: Where does a sink go dancing?
A: The Dish-co.
Q: What鈥檚 a princess鈥檚 favorite time?
A: Knight time.
Q: Why did the Genie get mad?
A: Because he was rubbed the wrong way.
Q: What鈥檚 a ballerina鈥檚 favorite type of bread?
A: A bun.
Q: What kind of dance was the frog prince best at?
A: Hip hop.
Q: What do bunnies like to do at the mall?
A: Shop 鈥榯il they hop.
Q: How did the beauty school student do on her manicure test?
A: She nailed it.
Q: What is corn鈥檚 favorite music?
A: Pop.
Q: Why can鈥檛 Monday lift Saturday?
A: It鈥檚 a weak day.
Q: Why was the politician out of breath?
A: He was running for office.
Q: What is a soccer player鈥檚 favorite chemical element?
A: Goooooooooooold!
Q: Why did the fastest cat in class get kicked out of school?
A: He was a cheetah.
Q: Which state has the greatest number of jokes?
A: Pennsylvania.
Q: Where is the best place to sit when a submarine is diving?
A: Inside.
Q: Why did the lawyer show up in court in his underwear?
A: He forgot his lawsuit.
Q: Why was the teenager no longer allowed online without a license?
A: He crashed the computer.
Q: What鈥檚 a ball that you don鈥檛 throw, shoot, eat, spit, bounce, or catch?
A: An eyeball.
Q: What do turtles, eggs, and beaches all have?
A: Shells.
Q: What time of year do people get injured the most?
A: In the fall.
Q: Why did the quarterback take the hardest classes?
A: Because he knew he would pass.
Q: Why did the musician throw away her table?
A: Because it was flat.
Q: Why didn鈥檛 the farmer's son study medicine?
A: Because he wanted to go into a different field.
Q: What is the math teacher鈥檚 favorite dessert?
A: Pi.
Q: Why was the princess in the emergency room?
What did the shoe say to the other shoe?
Nothing, it was tied up in another conversation.
Nutted in my shoes, now my kids are taking a walk.