Fired jokes

Why is black mystery not an Airheads flavor? Because we already know what happened to them. *shot fires*

A girl kept looking through the window whilst the boys got changed!

I, as a boy, was getting annoyed, so I found an interesting magazine in the corner. So, what did I do? Reload and fire!

Have you heard the 9/11 joke yet?... It was pretty fire.

What begins in F and ends in UCK?

Fire truck.

Why are the best used guns from France?

Because they have never been fired and they have only been dropped once.

Apex Legends: exists.

Titanfall fandom: (Literally on fire and at war with itself) "Everything is fine."

I like fire trucks and monster trucks.

There was a fire at my high school when I was in Year 7.

When the local newspaper interviewed my teacher, they asked her how she was seeing the "bright side" of it.

She said, "Well, at least our new students got a warm welcome!"

54 students died that day.

Your breath is so hot, it made the Chicago fire!

I pushed the disabled kid into a fire, then called him "Hot Wheels."

I pushed a disabled kid into a fire and roared, "Hot wheels!"

A priest and Rabbi run out of the orphanage.

Priest: "How the hell did that fire start?"

Rabbi: "I don't know, but what about the children?"

Priest: "Fuck the children."

Rabbi: "Do we have time?"

Priest: "There's always time for something like that."

If you give a man a match, he is warm for the night, but if you light a man on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life. :)

I usually don't make 9/11 jokes, but they just are fire.

There's a kid with loads of new firemen equipment and sees a fire engine go past and the kid asks the firemen, "Come have a look at my new gear." So the firemen go look at his gear, so then the kid says:

"I've got a helmet, a big jacket, and an oxygen tank, and a little wheelbarrow for my gear."

Firemen say: "Why is there a rope tied around a cat's balls?"

The kid says, "So I can have a siren nnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn"

Person 1: Hey, did you hear about the circus fire?

Person 2: No.

Person 1: It was in-tents.

What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?

Hot Wheels! We'll see him soon.

How do you get 500 drunk TTC people out? "Ah, on fire, a warning shot." "Uhhh sir, it's a M92 mortar." "Ah, just fire the shot!" Please get out before you get triggered from the pool and you have no clothes showing your nono parts. Oh wait, please get out of the pool drunk people. Potato, potatoes, fire ze shot.

I got fired my first day at the bank. This old lady told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

What is it called when someone is a wheel chair and in a fire?

Answer: Hot wheels...