Fear jokes
Pregnant teen: I'm pregnant, my mum's gonna kill me.
Unborn baby: My mum's gonna kill me.
"The naked man fears no pickpocket."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
Why is an orphan afraid to play baseball?
They are afraid they won't find home.
I hate nightmares.
Why was ten scared? Because it was between 9/11.
Why is 19 afraid?
Because if you add 400 to it, it’ll be next to 420.
I had a terrifying experience last night. I was alone in the house having a bath... when all of a sudden... I felt a tap on my shoulder.
Why is every number scared of 7?
Because 7 "ate" 9.
Why was Six afraid of Seven?
Because 7 was accused of the murder of 26 children.
I went on a walk last night with a really hot girl. Then she noticed me, and we went for a run.
Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 was a unregistered six offender.
Why was ten scared?
Because it was in the middle of 9/11.
Remember, if you are suffering from paranoia...
You are not alone.
I took an hour-long shower. The German officers were looking at me kinda scared.
You was reaching into you’re backpack and the whole class jumped through the window.
Pilot: This is my last flight, everyone.
Passengers: *Clap*
Pilot: I became a pilot for one reason: To conquer my greatest fear.
Flight Attendant: And what is that?
Pilot: Dying alone. *speeds up towards Twin Towers*
Also the Pilot: Now who is ready to play some Jen---
Your mama is so stupid, Patrick Starr ran away because he thought she might be contagious.
Yo mama so scary that the monsters have to look under the bed for her.
Yo mama so ugly that the monsters thought that she was their mother.
Why is Joe Biden afraid of getting COVID?
Because he'd lose his sense of smell.
Quiet Kid: *reaches into bag*
Teacher: EVERYBODY RUN!