Fat

Fat jokes

Ass

Yo ass so fat that you can't see your toes.

When you go to the movies, you take up seven rows.

Mom

Your mom's so fat, when she entered a fat contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals!"

Wheelchair

I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldn't get up out of his wheelchair and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.

Doll

You are so fat and ugly, Chucky didn't even want to play with you.

Sex

Me and my wife decided we would only smoke after sex.

I'm still on the first pack. She's up to 2 packs a week.

Mama

Your mama is so fat. Her high school picture is an aerial photograph.

Mama

Your mama is so fat, I had to look twice to get a first impression.

Mama

Your mama is so fat. When she went skydiving, it caused a global panic.

Mama

Your mama is so fat.

She went on a diet and solved world hunger!

Mama

Your mama is so fat and stupid. She got hit by a school bus. Her reply was, "Who threw that Twinkie at me?"

Mama

Your mama is so fat, guys have to bring climbing equipment to have sex with her.

Sister

You know, that I see my sister at home from school. She says everyone bullies me. I say, "Because you're a fat a**."

Mum

Your mum is so fat, when the doctors did her x-ray, the doctor said to her, "I want your x-ray, not an elephant's x-ray!"

Mama

Yo mama is so fat, she jumped on a trampoline and she broke it.

Sex

Did I tell you I finally got my wife to scream during sex? Yeah, you should have heard her the other day when I walked in on her.

Weight

You're so fat, when you went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."