Fan

Fan jokes

Clock

    • Once I went to a museum and overheard someone speaking to an employee for information.

    "These are lying clocks, they tell how many lies a person tells."

    "Oh, cool."

    "This is Mother Teresa’s clock; the clock hasn’t moved because she never lied."

    "Makes sense."

    "This is Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands only moved twice, indicating he only lied twice."

    "Where’s Trump’s clock?"

    "Oh, we’re using it as a ceiling fan."

    And then I burst out laughing 'cause it’s so true.

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    • Discrimination

    • We need to stop with all the discrimination here! I don’t discriminate! I love all races, even the bad ones, I’m a fan of all genders, even the fake ones, and am a fan of all nationalities, even the alien kinds.

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    • Ronaldo

    • It was an important knockout game for Al Nassr. I came to Riyad to see my idol Cristiano Ronaldo play. It was my dream for a long time. I took a cab to the stadium, but the driver dropped me off at a haunted house instead.

    As soon as I entered the house, I saw a ghost, but the very next moment I realized it's my idolo Ronaldo. Thank you Ronaldo for meeting me!

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    • Bee

    • Bee Jokes:

    "Hello."

    "Oh, hello, Buzzy!"

    "Why are ya calling me Buzzy this whole time?"

    "Because you BEE BUZZing!" (Laughs)

    "It's not funny! Jokes are the worst, although I hate those Bee Jokes!"

    "Chillax bro. Don't BEE a hater of jokes, dude!" (Laughs)

    "Aagh! You always had a choice, but I will sting ya face!"

    "No! You BEE like pollen to make HONEY-moon." (Laughs)

    "Stoooop!! I'm outta here, your worst fan."

    "Fan?"

    "Yes, your worst fan!"

    "No! Fan!"

    "What?! Aaaaaauuuuggghhhh!!!"

    "Ohhh! Buzzy's looking BEE-wind!" (Laughs)

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    • Fan memes

    Baby

    • Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.

    1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.

    2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.

    3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.

    4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.

    5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”

    6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!

    7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!

    8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!

    9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!

    10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!

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    • Call

    • A Chelsea fan called Timo Werner on his phone to encourage him during his bad form. Timo Werner still missed all the calls.

    Penaldo

    • I was swimming in a pool on my vacation when a fan of mine approached me. He said he wanted an autograph and gave me a pen to sign it. I accidentally dropped the pen in the pool. Suddenly, Penaldo came out of NOWHERE and dove to save it. He said he always dives for pens.

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