Family jokes
The twin towers are like my parents, only one came back.
What did the 9/11 survivor say when he went back to his family? "You won't believe it! The Twin Towers became conjoined twins when it happened!"
Orphan jokes are like families, not everyone gets 'em.
(Also, I banged ya mum ;))
I was looking for my sister... I looked down at my feet and saw her.
What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?
The second-hand book was loved once.
What do you call an orphan who became a priest?
Father-less.
Why do orphans get iPhones 11?
Because it has no home page.
Why do orphans want to be criminals?
To be wanted.
An orphan walks into a shop but gets lost, so he calls his mum but then remembers.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they never make it home.
Why does an orphan hate the ending of Finding Nemo?
Nemo goes back to his father.
What kind of flower do orphans use? Self-raising.
Why can orphans just be gay?
Cause they want to call somebody "daddy."
Your hairline goes further back than your mum's divorce.
Lol, I keep stealing my dad's medication money, and the best part is he never remembers.
A child has diarrhea and asked his mom for a Viagra. "Why in the world do you want that?" she asked him. He looks at her and says, "Well, that's what you gift dad when his shit won't get hard."
Mom: Daddy, stop!
Me: No!
Mom: Ok, I just wanted you to do it like your father.
What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common? Once they're gone they never come back.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
What type of flower does an orphan use?
Self-raising flour.