Family jokes
When my family goes to weddings, my senior relatives tell me things like “You’re next!” So I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because I can’t hit a home run. 💀💀💀
Your dad's Spider-Man because he's far from home.
What do you call 3 orphan girls in a tornado?
All of her twist.
If I wanted to hear beeping, I wouldn’t have pulled my grandma’s cord to live.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because he can't find home.
Knock knock. Who's there? Well, I will tell you who's not there: my dad.
My Mom said she's going to kill me if I don't stop using my computer.
My mom: Your life could be worse. You could be Tracy Latimer.
Me: I wish I were Tracy Latimer, then someone would kill me.
Mom: Do I look fat in my dress?
Child: Nah... you look fat in every dress!
Read my name.
Your mom disrespected your dad when he saw your face.
Yo mama so nasty, she gave yo daddy head, then gave you a kiss good night.
My mum is a vegan. She brings us to after school seitan.
Orphan: Can I come over?
Girl: Yeah, but you have to bring your parents.
An orphan can’t ever play Grand Theft Auto V because he can’t get a wanted level.
I bought my sister a trampoline. She sat in her wheelchair and cried.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To slide into your mom's bed.
Where can you find the most dads?
Milk Island.
You're so fat when you told your mum and dad, even they laughed!