Family jokes
As a kid, I was made to walk the plank.
Because we couldn't afford a dog.
Me: I have a dream.
Mom: What?
Me: For you to fucking shut up.
I made a website for orphans.
Unfortunately, it does not have a home page.
Orphan: I finally have a father!
God: And who is that?
Orphan: You!
God: Who the hell is you? Well, it's not me.
Orphan: :l
Mom!
Memes
It’s so cold make it stop
Mom! (DYM 22)
Why do orphans have no home?
Because they didn't have a family to give them one.
Why do orphans prefer the monarchy?
Because they could feel the warm[th] of the royal family.
Why did Ama cross the road?
To find his dad.
Why can't orphans go to school? They can't attend parent-teacher conferences.
Where does Kristen Stewart get her virginity from? She gets it from her mama and papa.
The only people who do yo mama jokes wish they had a mom.
The lasagna I just cooked is for me, my friends, and family. You don't get none because your name is not on the list. You wanna know why? 'Cause you got the whole place smelling like catdog and ass.
Why do orphans play baseball because they try to find home?
One day a mom who looked like a pig broke the car down.
Why was the orphan kid bad at school? Because he wanted a phone call home.
I asked my mom if I could be Wednesday (from the Addams family). She said no. She said I would look creepy and weird. She said I HAVE TO BE SOMETHING CUTE. The outfit looked ridiculous. Everyone else looked spooky except for me ;-;.
Why can't orphans cross roads?
They don't have a parent to hold hands with.
Why can’t orphans go on field trips?
They need a parent's signature.
Why can’t orphans go to school? Because they don’t have a parent to sign them up.