Family jokes
My son came to me depressed, so I pointed to the spare bedroom and said, "Hang in here, son."
Why can't orphans go on game shows?
You need a family member.
What's the difference between three cocks and a joke?
Your mom can't take a joke.
Yo mama soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo 1 hour later ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
What is an orphan's favorite Roblox game? Adopt Me.
Hey guys, the prank for today is when I lied about feeling sick so I wouldn't have to go to school.
Introduction: This prank was committed a week ago! Around 5:00 a.m. in the morning!
1. I got out some eggs, milk, salt, and a little bit of mashed olives... well those are the main ingredients.
2. I mixed it all up for about 2 mins just to make it look really like barf...no going to school today!
3. I put it under the sofa just to give it some solid scent to it.
4. I fixed my breakfast eggs and bacon. Then when my mom comes down I...PULL OUT MY FAKE BARF!!!!! News flash make a fake excuse for her to leave! My excuse is "I need something its in my room I don't want to get cause it would waste time".
She fell for it. Then I pull out my FAKE barf which looks like real barf. Then you say or I said "Mom I don't feel so good"! News flash: Don't over sell it think about all that boring school work! and guess what she fell for it so I spend all day doing nothing...absolutely nothing!
Well that's the prank. Anymore pranks you want ask me in the comment section! Byeeeeeeeeeee
Yo mama so ugly when her parents had a gender reveal party the balloon came out green.
My uncle is an alchemist.
He can turn 3 bottles of beer into 4 hours of abuse.
I walked into an orphanage and asked a kid why they were crying.
They said: "Because I lost my parents."
I said: "Let's find them."
They cried harder, so I walked out of the orphanage.
An orphan uses a family bathroom, and when he comes out, he gets told, "This is a family bathroom."
When I'm bored, I like to slap orphans. I mean, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why did the family get mad at the boy for eating at the funeral? While trying to season his food, he mistook his cremated grandfather for salt.
I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.
I got the joke from my brother.
What’s one thing you can say during family dinner and in bed?
"Will there be seconds?"
Your mom is a spy <3, just like in bed.
Your mama's so ugly, when she looked in the mirror, it said, "Viewer discretion advised!"
Roses are red, violets are violet,
My dad died in 9/11, he was a great pilot!
They don't have parents because they left when you were 0.
So little Johnny was on the bus, and the bus driver already hated him. So he started to talk to himself JUST loud enough for the bus driver to hear.
"If my dad was a bull, and my mom was a cow, that would make me... a little bull!"
"If my dad was a rooster, and my mom was a hen, that would make me... a little rooster!"
And by this point, the bus driver was fed up with him, so he said:
"Ok little Johnny, I got one for you: If your dad was a drunk, and your mom was a whore, what would that make you?"
Little Johnny smiled and said: "A bus driver!"
Why can orphans not play baseball?
Because they can't find home.