Family jokes

If you can't see your family... you're an orphan.

I like to make your mom jokes.

Because they're easy like your mom.

Why do orphans go to church?

They have someone to call "father" there.

If you want an orphan joke, just look in a mirror.

Daughter: Hey Dad, can I use your car?

Dad: Sure, but first you have to give me a blow job."

Daughter: Okay, (proceeds to service dad). Dad, ewww, your dick tastes like shite!"

Dad: Oh, that's right, I lent your brother the car.

Tell an orphan "your mom", but then remember he doesn't have one.

Yo mama's so ugly, her birth certificate is an apology letter.

What is an orphan's first step to the orphanage?

Why can't an orphan be gay? Because they have no one to call "daddy"/"mommy."

My mom went to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.

What's the difference between a criminal and an orphan?

One is wanted and one's not.

Mummy, how was I born?

Mummy replied, "Well, your father and I got married, and soon I became fat and you came out, and then in, out, in, out, and after you did that a million times, you were born."

Fatherless jokes.

What's the difference between orphans and apple trees?

The apples actually get picked.

Why can't orphans be gay?

Because they have no one to call "daddy."

Why did the orphan cheat on his girlfriend with a guy?

Because he wanted someone to call "Mommy" and "Daddy."

Timmy: Stupid motherfucker.

Jimmy: Wow, do you kiss your mother with that mouth?

Timmy: *starts crying*

Jimmy: Ah fuck, I did it again.

What is an orphan's least favorite game?

44 Homes.

My April Fool's joke is going to an orphanage and telling them their parents came back.

Why do orphans not play baseball?

Because they don't know the way home!