Family

Family jokes

Mistake

    • Guy spills milk on me. I say, "It's okay, we all make mistakes sometimes, but apparently your mom made a big one."

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    • Dad

    • I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.

    But when I got home, all the signs were there.

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    • Condom

    • "Son, I found a condom in your room."

    "Gee, thanks, Grandpa!"

    "Why are you calling me Grandpa?"

    "Because I couldn't find it yesterday."

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    • Family memes

    Name

    • So there's this uncle of female and male twins, and his sister, the mother of the twins, is stuck trying to think of a name for the children. The uncle says, "I've got an idea!", and the mother gets excited, thinking this could be it. She says, "What should their names be?"

    The uncle replies, "Well for your daughter, Denise." "That's a nice name," comments the mother, "but what about my son?" The uncle simply replies, "Denephew".

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    • Sex

    • What does your first football game and your first time having sex have in common?

    You were bloody and battered but at least your dad came.

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    • Threesome

    • I encountered a milf at a bar last night. Although she is 57 years old, she is still very charming and sexy.

    We were drinking, chatting, laughing, and having a good time.

    Then, she asked me flirtatiously,

    "Have you ever tried a mother-daughter threesome before?"

    I said, "Nope, not yet."

    She drank a little more, and said, "Well, darling, tonight is your lucky night."

    So she took me to her place.

    She took out her keys, opens her door, turns on the light, and she yells towards upstairs,

    "Mom, are you still awake?"

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    • Dollar

    • Raaj went up to his mom and said, "I bet you 10 dollars I can disappear." Then he turned off the lights.

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