Family jokes
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home ;)
Orphan: Just two things I don’t have.
He probably picks hair off his dad’s dick, then probably puts it in his hair.
Fun fact: If you're an orphan, you probably don't know your parents.
Bread is like an orphan: plain and stale and no fam.
Me: I fucked your mom.
Orphan: I don't have a mom so you fucked the air.
Memes
I bought my son an Xbox in 2017. It’s now 2018, and I’m still waiting for him to open it.
What is David Bowie known for when making music? He gets his beats from his kids.
My uncle got really badly burned the other day.
They don't fuck around at the crematorium.
Q: What did the little girl say to her leper daddy?
A: "Oops, I got your nose!"
Why did the strawberry cry?
Her mom was in a jam.
Why was the orphan so bad at baseball?
He couldn't find home.
Orphan's prayer: In the name of the Father, The Son, The Holy Spirit. Amen.
Why can’t orphans play baseball??
Because they can’t find their way to home plate.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because they can’t find home.
An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"
What kind of shirts does Sally's parents get her?
Long sleeves.
Orphan: I want to be like Batman.
Orphan worker: You are already like him, honey.
An orphan died. No one cared, why? Who is supposed to spread the word? His parents.
What do you call a mom that is yours?
Your mom!
Hi Mom, how are you doing?