Family jokes
Food makers are proudly presenting human flesh-made foods. Donate your useless friends and family to us because we're saving lives.
T and C apply. This is only in the best shops in your town, or down the road, or in your country. 1 like = 1 family member donated 'cause we're saving lives😎😎
There’s a lot of talk about starting families, but no one ever talks about finishing what they started.
I'd like to have kids one day.
I don't think I could stand them any longer than that, though.
Magician: "I am the greatest magician in the whole world. Look, now you see the rabbit in the hat, and now it is gone!"
Redneck girl: "That's nothing. My dad is the greatest magician! He disappears for a whole year and reappears at Christmas for a couple of hours!"
So things are just too tiring to sort out... like which adoption center you should send your son to?
Orphan: I'm hungry.
Dad: Let's go to KFC.
Orphan 2: Boy, you don't got a dad!
Why can orphans only watch G-rated movies?
Because they have no parental guidance.
What is the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?
One of them is picked.
Mom, where are we going?
To your grandma's funeral.
Yeah, 'cause I 360 no-scoped that b*tch in the face.
I just competed in a wrestling tournament. The first guy hit me harder than my dad’s belt.
My ex's dad died while she was texting me. She said she had a boyfriend, but I told her I had a dad.
Your mama's so young your dad went to jail.
What is an orphan's least favorite store? Home Depot.
What's the difference between a puppy and an orphan?
Puppies get adopted.
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home.
Orphan: Oh, cool, something we have in common.
What do orphans' parents have in common with Nemo?
They both can’t be found.
I'll never forget my grandpa's last words:
"You need to park a little closer."
I'll call your mom a cow, but which one?
When I get jokes. They aren't f****** restarted like you.
My sister.
Yo mama is so lazy that the only letters she knows are "NO".