Family jokes

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

They can’t get to home run!

Friend A: "Why are you still a virgin, bro?"

Friend B: "I was until last night."

Friend A: "Nah, nah, who with?"

Friend B: "Your sister."

Friend A: "I don't have a sister."

Friend B: "Just wait 9 months, you'll see."

What is an orphan's favorite toy? A mom and dad action figure.

What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?

An apple actually gets picked.

What did the drummer call his twin daughters?

Anna one, Anna two!

When someone says you're an orphan, say, "At least I was wanted, unlike you!"

Why did the orphans go to the church?

Because they need someone to call "father."

Mary has a house near a forest. She lives with her bro, and she once asked, "How many trees are there?" Her bro said: "I don't know." She said: "Tree."

Do not tell an orphan family meeting; they wouldn't get it.

Orphans would be upset if they went to FamilyMart.

'Cause they sell oden, not a family.

A woman in labor suddenly shouted, "Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Couldn't! Didn't! Can't!"

"Don't worry," said the doc. "Those are just contractions."

Ur mom gay.

Yo mama so ugly, she made everybody's face fall off.

My family.

A baby is like another step. You use it just the same as the other steps.

What do you think of your mom? I have to go now and tyyyytt.

What did the stepdad say to the flower? You're grounded!

They don't have parents because they left when you were 0.

Why can’t I drive? 'Cuz my dad never showed me how, yet.

Yo' mama is so stupid, she couldn't find a needle in a haystack.