Family jokes
Why can’t an orphan use an iPhone?
Because it can’t find the home button.
I love to play catch with my dad! He's never there to catch the ball, though.
Why are orphans good at math? Because they can subtract their parents from the family.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To find their parents.
My parents love me.
Wife: I will leave you if you call me fat again.
Husband: Wait, dear... Don’t do it for the sake of our kid!
Wife: Kid?
Husband: Yeah, aren’t you pregnant?
My mom told me she couldn't open the garage door. Then it opened up to me that it wasn't broke anymore.
One day, this dad and his son went to a basketball factory, and the son said, "I want to buy some balls." The dad said, "What for?" The son said, "So you can have some balls."
I got a pen for my baby sister. Best trade I made so far.
What's an orphan's favorite shop? Home Depot.
My dad died in 9/11....
He was a good driver.
Yo mama's feet are so fat, she had to wear a sock on each toe.
If you have sex and your African parents find out,
“You can do the boom boom. But you can not do the boom boom in my house. Do it somewhere else."
A mom and her two children were eating at a place while playing trivia when she asked what does AIDS stand for? Her son Dallyn has no idea, but her daughter Emberlee, who has always been a little odd, says, "An Intentional Disease." Her brother and mom just stared!
If your parents ever accuse you of lying... Say, "You're the one who told me about Santa Claus!"
What's an orphan's most hated show?
The Fosters.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
'Cause they don’t know where home is.
Why do people make orphan jokes... their parents will get mad... oh wait, never mind, please continue.
Your birth certificate is a complaint to the condom factory.
A hillbilly female has to decide if she would save her brother or her boyfriend. She chose both because her brother is her boyfriend.