I have no father or no milk. Like if you relate.
My grandfather said we rely on technology too much so I unplugged his life support. Luckily I remember his last words . "You little bastard!"
Roses are red My soul is black I am never getting My dad back
Can Orphans go to a Family Restaurant?
In school, we learned that squirrels stick their nuts in trees. So, just like my uncle dave...
Asked my dad what LGBT stands for
He started with "Lettuce? Bacon. Tomato. What's the 'g' for?" Obviously I had to reply with "Garnish".
Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.
9 months later they happily had some use for their baby carriage.
2 years later they went up again then their daughter had a brother.
But 1 little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother..
Only one of Kenny's girlfriends has ever said he's good in bed. But she has to. She's his mom.
When a family friend passed away, my granddaughter took her three-year-old son to visit the widow. As they approached the front door, she whispered to the boy, “Make sure to tell her how sorry you are.”
He whispered back, “Why? I didn’t kill him.”
Me: hey do you want to see my grandma. Friend: yeah sure Me: *pulls out gun*
Can't wait to meet you! So join the Depression family! We open real soon! Try best to hold onto sanity!
I was raised an only child, which really pissed my brother.
There was a cannibal who had a wife and (eight) kids.
One man's trash is another man's treasure.... Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you're adopted
My sister and I were both adopted from the same country, and my parents say they got us on a "two for one special."
Guys my sisters pregnant!
Im finally a dad!
Why are orphans so good at tennis?
Because that’s the only love they get
I had recently found out that my grandma died. We did an autopsy and the results came back. They were pretty shocking.
We found out that she died............... from an autopsy
Christopher’s Mom said one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Turns out Christopher was adopted.
when i sh one day, my mother told me that it cuter her deep, we both found that very amusing
