Family jokes
Me: I fucked your mom.
Orphan: I don't have a mom so you fucked the air.
What do you call your son?
An mistake.
How many fat people are in my house?
20, counting the kids in the basement.
What do Jesus and I have in common? Our dads left us...
My sister and I were both adopted from the same country, and my parents say they got us on a "two for one special."
When someone calls you, say this: "Hi, welcome to Dave’s Orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"
When you go to your girlfriend's house but accidentally go into her dad's room and fuck him anyway.
Your mom is a mom!
I would tell you a story of my dad... If I knew who he was.
I saw a petition on replacing gravestones with trees so it will be a beautiful forest.
Son: Where's grandma?
Question: What did the sun say to the little star?
Answer: Are you my SUN?
Why can't orphans play online games? Because they don't have parents to sign them up.
Why hasn't my dad come back? No seriously, I'm not joking.
Wife: Honey, I love you.
Husband: I love you all.
Wife: Awww.......... Wait WHAT?!?!??!
Yo mama so hairy that when she go to the hair salon they say, "No pets allowed."
You and your mom.
Why can orphans type? Because they can’t find the home row.
My dad called me as I said I shit in my sister's mouth. Impossible? Nope.
What do you say after committing incest?
No Chromo!
Why was the chicken black and the other were white? Adoption!