Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
They never reached home.
Family Jokes
Girl (on thirteenth birthday): Ma, why did papa leave?
Mother: Well, it started exactly 1 year and 189 days ago...
A mom cow's last words were to the mom cow's son. They were, "You are..." then died. The son thought that he was adopted, but then three years later, the mom cow rose from the dead and said to her son that she was going to say, "You were adorable." Then she died once more. Then two years later, she rose from the dead for the last time to say to her son, "And that's why we adopted you."
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can never find home.
Why wouldn’t Mrs. Grapes leave her children behind?
Because she loves raisin kids.
Your momma is so fat, when she gets done having sex she rolls over and smokes a ham.
Three people die on the same day: a German, an American, and an Italian. They all go to Hell for various reasons.
American: "I won't ever see my dog again!"
Italian: "I won't ever make pizzas again!"
German: "Hey, granddad, how have you been?"
I can't sit down anymore... My dad went too far this time.
Kid goes to the kitchen.
Mom: What are you doing here?
Kid: Just checking out the knife.
Mom: So you've chosen death.
Why does an orphan have to go to church? Because that's the only way he can pray for a father.
If I adopt a child, is it mine?
🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯😳
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home plate.
Why can’t orphans go on field trips? Because they need parent permission.
Kenney lost his virginity to a $10 hooker, but he only had to pay $5. She was his sister, so he got the family discount.
I'm about to go to the orphanage to tell yo mama jokes.
When a cat gets a sibling, do they say, "Oh, shit! Another mew kid?!?!?!"
Me: Says to kid at adoption center, "You're adopted!"
Me and kid: hug.
Thought this site needed a little bit of nice jokes.
There are days I feel really bad for my Wife. She has to feed me in the same place I take a dump.
She really hates it when I spit my food back out.
Why can't orphan kids play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
Did you know the letter "F" in orphan stands for family?
