Existence jokes

Me.

What’s the difference between a Canadian and a unicorn?

Nothing, they’re both mythical creatures.

What is life?

You know what I saw today?

Everything I looked at.

My sex life.

The world's funniest joke? Your life.

People say that life is short.

I say... life is the longest thing we ever do.

Your life? Wanna hear a sadder one?

My life.

Y'all wanna hear a joke? My life.

Please don't kill [me].

Some people ask why jokes exist. I say, when a mommy and daddy love each other very much, they have sex, and they make another one of you.

My dick is longer than your life.

THERE IS NO AFTERLIFE.

Want to hear a joke?

My life. Get it?

My horrible life.

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh life?

What's the difference between a pile of 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?

A Mustang Challenger doesn't exist.

U were accidental.

Q: Why didn’t Santa eat the milk and cookies you set out for him?

A: He doesn’t exist, you childish sh**!

Before the chicken or the egg, there was only Chuck Norris.