What did the bus driver say to the car? What is your address
What's white, yellow and goes 40 mph?
A train driver's egg sandwich
UGHHHHHHH TODAY WAS TERRIBLE MY WIFE GOR HOT BY A BUS!!! AND I LOST MY JOB AS A BUS DRIVER!!
Just because I don't like Lewis Hamilton, doesn't make me racist.
What do you call a school bus driver that can not walk.? A silly đ school bus driver
When the Driver ran out of fuel what kind of gasoline did he use grassoline
What do you call a school bus driver that keeps going to sleep? A monster
What kind of bus is yellow? A school bus driver.
two persons were in a car the brakes were broken and they were so fast that they would crash and die. The driver said:" Oh no! we will die!" but the person sitting next to him replied:" Don't panic the stop sign at the end of the road will stop us."
My dad died in 911.... He was a good driver
Knock, knock. (Whoâs there?) Itâs the police maâam, your son got hit by a drunken driver heâs dead.
One day the Pope is coming to America in his Limo and he said to the driver, âWhy donât you let me drive for ones.â The driver thinks to him self, âWell I canât say no to this guy, heâs the pope.â So the driver pulls over and they change places. The Pope was having fun, hauling butt down the freeway, dogging cars. After a while the driver taps on the window and tells the Pope, âslow down a bit, you might get pulled over.â The Pope says, âAhhh, donât worry about it, Iâm the Pope.â So he rolls up the window and continues to drive very fast. After a few moments he gets pulled over. The cop walks to the car and the Pope rolls down the tinted window. The cop sees the Pope and says, âOh, I, ehhh, sorry, can you hold on a minute.â The Pope says, âSure.â The cop walks back to his car and radios back to the station. He says, âGuys I just pulled over some one really important.â
They ask who, âThe President?.â âNo more important.â âThe president of another country.â âNo more important.â âAn ambassador.â âNo even more important.â âWell who is it.â âI donât know, but the Pope is the chauffeur.â
A man is pulled over by a police officer.
The policeman approaches the driver's door. "Is there a problem, Officer?"
The officer says, "Sir, you were speeding. Can I see your license please?"
The driver responds, "I'd give it to you, but I don't have one."
"You don't have one?"
The man responds, "I lost it four times for drunk driving."
The officer is shocked. "I see. Can I see your vehicle registration papers please?"
"I'm sorry, I can't do that."
The officer says, "Why not?"
"I stole this car."
The officer says, "Stole it?"
The man says, "Yes, and I killed the owner."
At this point the officer is getting irate. "You what?!"
"She's in the trunk if you want to see."
The officer looks at the man and slowly backs away to his own car and calls for back up. Within minutes, five police cars show up, surrounding the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half-drawn gun.
The senior officer says, "Sir, could you step out of your vehicle please?"
The man steps out of his vehicle. "Is there a problem, sir?"
"One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner."
"Murdered the owner?"
The officer responds, "Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car please?"
The man opens the trunk, but there is nothing there.
The officer says, "Is this your car, sir?"
The man says, "Yes," and hands over the registration papers.
The officer, understandably, is quite stunned.
"One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license."
The man digs through his pockets, pulls out a wallet and hands it to the officer. The officer opens the wallet and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
"Thank you, sir. One of my officers told me you didn't have a license, stole this car, and murdered the owner."
The man replies, "I bet you the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too!"
Drivers License-By- watersharky Music Productions and Olivia Rodrigo- I got my driver's license last week Just like we always talked about 'Cause you were so excited for me To finally drive up to your house But today I drove through the suburbs Crying 'cause you weren't around And you're probably with that blonde girl Who always made me doubt She's so much older than me She's everything I'm insecure about Yeah, today I drove through the suburbs 'Cause how could I ever love someone else? And I know we weren't perfect but I've never felt this way for no one And I just can't imagine how you could be so okay now that I'm gone Guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me 'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street And all my friends are tired Of hearing how much I miss you, but I kinda feel sorry for them 'Cause they'll never know you the way that I do, yeah Today I drove through the suburbs And pictured I was driving home to you And I know we weren't perfect But I've never felt this way for no one, oh And I just can't imagine how you could be so okay, now that I'm gone I guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me 'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street Red lights, stop signs I still see your face in the white cars, front yards Can't drive past the places we used to go to 'Cause I still fuckin' love you, babe (ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh) Sidewalks we crossed I still hear your voice in the traffic, we're laughing Over all the noise God, I'm so blue, know we're through But I still fuckin' love you, babe (ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh) I know we weren't perfect but I've never felt this way for no one And I just can't imagine how you could be so okay, now that I'm gone 'Cause you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me 'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street Yeah, you said forever, now I drive alone past your street...
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
What do you call an autistic person with a driver's license?
A LETHAL WEAPON!
Guy : are you depression cause you're crippling me Car driver : no I'm the guy that hit you with his car and crippled you Guy : don't worry I was already crippled because I got crippling depression
WANT TO KNOW OF A FUNNY JOKE
WOMEN DRIVERS
Why is paul a Walker?
To let people know he isn't a driver
1. A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."â¨The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.â¨"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"â¨Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.â¨"Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"â¨The boy licked his cone and replied: â¨"Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!" 2. "If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up", said the sarcastic teacher.â¨After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet.â¨"Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?", inquired the teacher with a sneer.â¨"Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself." 3. A guy said to God, "God, is it true that to you a billion years is like a second?"â¨God said yes.â¨The guy said, "God, is it true that to you a billion dollars is like a penny?"â¨God said yes.â¨The guy said, "God, can I have a penny?"â¨God said, "Sure, just a second." 4. Putin is held hostage by a terrorist. A Russian truckdriver stops at the back of a long queue on the motorway. He sees a policeman walking down the line of stopped cars to briefly talk to the drivers. As the policeman approaches the truck, the truckdriver rolls down his window and asks, "What's going on?"â¨Policeman: "A terrorist is holding Putin hostage in a car. He's demanding 10 million rubles, or he'll douse Putin in petrol and set him on fire. So we're asking drivers for donations."â¨Driver: "Oh, ok. How much do people donate on average."â¨Policeman: "About a gallon." 5. A wife got so mad at her husband she packed his bags and told him to get out. As he walked to the door she yelled, "I hope you die a long, slow, painful death." â¨He turned around and said, "So, you want me to stay?" 6. My boss was honest with me today. He pulled up to work with his sweet new car this morning and I complimented him on it. He replied, "Well, if you work hard, set goals, stay determined and put in long hours, I can get an even better one next year." 7. After a prolonged drought when the rain came, all the animals in the forest were happy except the Kangaroo. When the others asked him what the reason was for such sadness, the Kangaroo revealed that the rain meant that all its kids would now be playing inside. 8. My girlfriend and I are trying this whole "long distance relationship" thing.â¨I have to stay 100 feet away from her at all times. Also, the police say I should stop referring to her as my girlfriend. 9. The wife and I took a long, leisurely drive out to the country and pulled over to fill up our car's gas tank and tires... She was surprised to see that the station had a fee to fill the tires and asked me, "Why in the world do they charge for AIR?!"â¨I responded, "Inflation." 10. During my check-up I asked the Doctor, "Do you think I'll live a long and healthy life then?"â¨He replied, "I doubt it somehow. Mercury is in Uranus right now."â¨I said, "I don't go in for any of that astrology nonsense."â¨He replied, "Neither do I. My thermometer just broke."
