Dont jokes
The guard caught one of the fugitives as he tried to escape. All he said was...
"Don't let your guard down."
Why can’t orphans play poker? Because they don’t know what a full house is.
I only have 4 moods:
• fuck this • fuck that • fuck me • fuck you
I empathize with the above, but I have an additional 4 moods to add:
• fuck yeah • fuck no • fuck my life • fuck everything
and don't forget the inevitable
• fuck it
and for those who have just given up
• fuck
This is beautiful.
I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.
He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"
Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"
I don’t see why emo kids don’t like to hang around.
I see them hang all day.
Why don't orphans care if they get in trouble? They can't call their parents.
What did one butthole say to the other?
"I don't know WHAT got into me last night!"
A high school student and his best friend were rushing to class after his best friend caused them both to be late. His best friend asked, "Would you like to hear a joke?" "Sure," he replied. "What do you and your sister have in common?" "I don't know." "Because of me you're both late for your next period."
What is the orphan's favorite toy from his parents?
They don’t have parents to pay for a toy.
I cleaned my room today. While sweeping under the bed, I heard my mop collide with something. To my surprise, I found Pristiano Penaldo hiding under my bed! My dad said, “Don’t bother sweeping him son, he’s been dusted for years.” I was shocked but not surprised.
What do people have that orphans don't? A family.
I called my sister a party pooper after she came to my party uninvited.
Grampa said that the only ones who poop at parties are the ones who don't get invited.
So I guess that means I was the party pooper at my own birthday?
Q: What did one dead hooker say to the other dead hooker?
A: Nothing, dead hookers don't talk.
Why don't orphans go on trips at school?
Parent signature: _______________
You: What do you call a door knob without the lock?
Me: I don't know.
You: Are you sure?
Me: I don't know.
You: Okay.
Why can orphans get away from the FBI?
Because they don't have a house.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Why can't orphans go on field trips?
They don't have anybody to sign the form.
My mom told me to get off the computer or she will slam my head into the keyboard.
I don't think she lskdjfklsdjf.
How do pirates like their movies?
You already know the answer, don't you?
Well...
ARRR rated! Huh huh huh...