Disability jokes
I pushed the kid in the wheelchair down the hill, but before I did, I set his wheels on fire and called him "hot wheels."
I told a crippled guy he is immortal because he can't kick the bucket.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome on the beach?
A baked potato.
Give a blind kid a torch and tell him it's a hairdryer.
If you ever get mad at a person that crumpled their leg, don't forget that they can hide, but they can't run.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair. 😎
Why did Helen Keller ride a broken roller coaster?
She didn't see anything wrong with it.
When Stephen Hawking found out about physics, he was speechless.
How do you execute a retard?
The Electric Wheelchair.
Have you ever walked past Steven Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.
What did the Asian parents say when they had a disabled kid?
Sum ting wong.
A blind guy walks into a bar.
My handicapped friend was getting bullied. I said, "Just stand up for yourself!"
Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind.
Knock knock Who’s there? Not Sally.
These three men wanted to start a band. One had the idea to call them the Rolling Stones, one wanted to call them the Veggies, the other said, "Let's be the Cripples," as they all rolled away.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They put doorknobs on a wall and said, "Open the door."
Why did Steven Hawking only tell one-liners?
Because he couldn't do standup.
What do you call a Chinese person with no legs?
Lim Ping.
I gave a blind kid a pistol and said it was a hairdryer.
What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg?
Eileen.