Disability jokes

Paraplegic

They have a new line of socks for paraplegics.

They are so comfortable they can't even feel them.

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  • Car

    Why is parking a car like finding a girlfriend?

    All the good ones are taken, so you stick it in the disabled one and hope nobody notices.

  • 1
  • Leper

    Q: Why was the leper hockey game cancelled?

    A: There was a face off in the corner.

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  • Memes

    Suicide

    My friend was on a wheelchair... he committed suicide yesterday. I remember when I met him last time, he told us a good joke and I appreciated him and told him to become a stand-up comedian.

    Pen

    Why couldn't Sally write with the pen? (Friend: Idk, why?) Because she had no arms.

    Why couldn't Sally play Tennis? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) Yes, she had no arms.

    Why did Sally fall off the swing? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) No, Joe pushed her.

    Why couldn't Sally pick up the box? (Friend: *Some weird guess*) Because she had no arms.

    Why did Sally drop her ice cream? (Friend: Because she had no arms?) Because she got hit by a bus.

    Knock Knock. (Friend: Who's there?) Not Sally.

    Bullying

    My friend and I were walking down the street, and we saw this one disabled kid getting bullied by three other kids. Urgently, we sprinted over to help. He had no chance against the five of us.

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  • Sally

    Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

    Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

    What first went through Sally's head when the Nazis came? A bullet.

    Where did Sally go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

    What did Sally get for Christmas? A bike.

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  • Set up

    I'm trying to come up with a set-up for an amputee joke, but I'm stumped.

    Dog

    What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it's not coming anyways.

    Wheelchair

    I was beefing with a dude in a wheelchair, so I took his wheelchair and threw it across the street and told him, "Walk it off, you will be fine."