Disability jokes
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair and said, "Hot Wheels!"
Me and my girlfriend broke up, and I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
Why are Helen Keller jokes so funny?
Because she’s blind and deaf.
A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."
Son: Mom, what's dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I'm blind.
Mom: Exactly.
Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"
Why couldn’t Helen Keller scream when she fell off the cliff?
Because she was wearing mittens.
Playing hide and seek with Helen Keller wasn’t the best idea you’ve had all day.
A dad is in a wheelchair and his daughter goes, "Don't step on a crack!"
You failed Helen Keller's speech class? It's okay, she's not a very good speaker.
I kick a soccer ball at someone in a wheelchair. Now we're playing Rocket League.
Why do Christmas trees like wheelchairs? Because they have kids.
What do you call a girl with one leg? Ilean.
Why was Stephen Hawking a bad influence towards kids? Because he couldn’t stand for anything.
Do you know where Helen Keller lives?
Neither does she.
Why didn’t Steven Hawking go to heaven? Because it was a stairway, not a rampway.
How did Stephen Hawking actually die?
He lost Wi-Fi connection.
What is so good about a dog that cannot see? Nothing is good.
Why do tables never need wheelchairs?
Because even without the ‘t’ they are still able.
A blind man walks into a bar and starts to swing his guide dog around his head. The bartender asks him nervously, "Are you okay?" The blind man replies, "Yeah, I’m just looking around!"