Why don't paralyzed people laugh?
They hate stand-up comedy.
Disability Jokes
Why can't Stephen Hawking be the real Slim Shady?
Because he can't stand up, can't stand up.
How do you beat Hellen Keller in musical chairs?
You move the chairs.
What do you call a blind person driving a car?
Died.
When I saw Stephen Hawking for the first time, I knew he had been in a shop!!! I lieeeeeeeeed! 🤣🤣🤣
I wish we could implant all parts because I could have used some car parts from Stephen Hawking after he died.
What makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar?
They can't stand up for themselves.
Stephen Hawking had a high I.Q., but still had to learn how to be disabled.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common: They both can't see their parents.
I was bullying Stephen Hawking. I told him, "Why not stand up for yourself?"
What did the soldier say when he saw a terrorist in a wheelchair?
"An RC-XD!"
You didn't know that Helen Keller is dead? It's fine; neither does she.
Why haven't they put Stephen Hawking in charge yet?
On one hand he was fantastic and the other a spastic. You could say he was a fantastic spastic.
What color is Stephen Hawking's house?
It's a bungalow.
Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.
Why was Stephen Hawking never trusted when taking a quiz?
"No computers allowed on the test!"
I gave a deaf kid AirPods.
Your disabled joke on you can't stand.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Special forces.
