Disability jokes
Santa Claus gave a child a bike and a football. The child wasn’t happy. Why?
He had no legs.
Why can't blind people fish?
Because it was "see food."
What do you call your sister if she only has one leg?
Ei-lean.
God: “Stephen, join us!”
*sees the staircase to heaven.*
Stephen: “Shit!”
Stephen Hawking died because he rolled too far from the outlet.
Have you ever heard Stephen Hawking sing?
"Head, shoulders, wheels and frames, wheels and frames!"
Why did Stephen Hawking make it to heaven?
He couldn't make it up the stairs.
Have you ever walked through Stephen Hawking's house? No?
Well..... neither has he.
There was a blind man. He was blind. Ha, sucks for him.
Why did Stephen Hawking roll across the road?
Because he had amyotrophic lateral sclerosis.
What do you call a washed vegetable?
A disabled kid that needs a towel.
What did the blind man say when he walked by the fish store?
"Hello Ladies!"
Why did Helen Keller walk in on someone in the bathroom?
Because she didn’t know it was the bathroom.
Son: Yo dawg, tell me a story.
Dad: Y'all motherfuckers ain't gon' believe dis shit, so there was dis fairy aight, she had wings, so she flys into a KFC, and comes out with wings, chicken wings.
Also, why did Hawking try to walk across the road? His wheelchair only goes 1 mph, so he got hit by a bus.
Why do you make fun of disabled people?
They can't stand up for themselves.
What is the definition of Endless Love?
Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder playing tennis!
That moment when the disabled kid has to take the Pacer test.
My blind friend got ran over by a parked car.
Why did Suzy fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Not Suzy.
How do you know when a cabbage is boiled?
The wheelchair floats to the top.