Disability jokes
Why did the blind man cross the road?
Don't ask me, he can't even see where he's going.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His PC overheated.
Little Johnny has no arms. Knock, knock, who's there?
Not Johnny.
Stephen Hawking was incredible at poker, he had no tell whatsoever.
Helen Keller def faked it.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Knock knock.
WHO'S THERE?
*Starts putting up hand signs.*
When a deaf person has sex, do they use one hand to moan?
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite line in Rambo?
"Don't push me."
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and his wheelchair?
At least his wheelchair can pull a woman.
What did Stephen Hawking say when he rode a bike?
"Hey look...no hands...or legs!"
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite football anthem?
You'll Never Walk Alone.
What Stephen Hawking doesn't know about wheelchairs isn't worth knowing.
Rory Burrows is dyslexic.
What was Helen Keller's favorite game when she was a kid?
I spy.
Have you met Bofa?
Bofa deez blind kids!
What happens to Stephen Hawking when he logs in to his account on Google when it says, "I am not a robot?"
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I decided to take her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
Stephen Hawking talks by clicks. Two clicks is "hi," and five is "dab me up."
My speech impediment has gotten so worse that I stutter when typing sentences.
What motorway lane does Stephen Hawking use?
Hard shoulder.