Disability jokes
Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?
Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.
Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.
Why are disabled people screwed?
Because you can't run or hide!
A wife says to her husband, "You're always pushing me around and talking behind my back." "What do you expect?" he says, "You're in a fucking wheelchair!"
Q. What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?
A. Cancer.
Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with only one hand?
A: She moans with the other.
What did the deaf, dumb, blind, paraplegic, autistic baby get for Christmas? AIDs.
What do you call a room full of disabled people with epilepsy?
A seizure salad.
What do you call an army of disabled people?
Special forces.
How do you ground a person in a wheelchair?
Take off the wheels!
What's the difference between a seal and a special kid?
They both go: "Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Uh!"
Stop joking about Helen Keller so much! It’s rude, poor woman! You all just wait till she hears about this!
What do you call a paralyzed kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
What do you call a man with no arms or legs being pulled by a boat?
Skip.
Put Helen Keller in George Floyd's position. How would she cry out for help? Would she just moan, or would she try to do sign language?
What has 2 arms but no legs?
A crippled woman with no more meaning in her life.
Hellen Keller walked into a bar, then a chair, then a table.
Son: Daddy, what's dark humor?
Dad: See that man over there with no arms or legs? Go tell him to stand up and clap.
Son: But Daddy, I'm blind.
Dad: Exactly.
What is a disabled person's favorite type of comedy? Sit-down comedy!
Guy with no arms: Even if I don’t have arms, I can do everything you can do.
🎵if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands🎵
I went to a library and I started to make fun of a disabled guy. He started crying, and I said, "Stand up for yourself!"