Crack jokes
Apparently, I'm a category for jokes now. Hmm... ok!
#HOMIEZ4Life
P.S. Say "crack my finger," now say it backwards :)
My dad: You better wear flip-flops everywhere.
Suicidal son: Goes to crack alley.
Is necrophilia considered cracking open a cold one?
I was arrested for eating too much crack on accident. How?
My sister came into my room shoving her ass in my face.
Yo mama so stupid that when the mirror cracked, she tried to order another one.
What did the people who cracked the Liberty Bell get for breaking it?
The no-bell prize.
Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying 10 pounds of CRACK.
Did you know what my grandpa wanted for Christmas? A new ass because his one has a crack on it.
Why can't the toilet paper cross the road? It was stuck in a crack.
What do you call a smart egg? An egghead.
That was an egg-cellent joke!
What does your mom and a slinky have in common?
They aren't much to look at, but you can't help but crack a smile when you see them tumbling down the stairs.
Jack and Molly are sitting in school one day. Molly is asleep when the teacher asks her a question, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?”
Jack sees Molly is sleeping and quickly pokes her with a sharp pencil.
“Jesus Christ almighty!” shouts Molly.
“Correct,” says the teacher.
The next day the teacher asks, “Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?”
Molly is again asleep and is poked by Jack’s pencil.
“Jesus Christ almighty!” she shouts.
“Correct again,” says the teacher.
The next day, for a 3rd time, Molly is asleep.
This time the teacher asks her, “What did Eve say to Adam when she had so many children?”
Jack pokes Molly with the pencil again, and this time Molly screams “If you stick that thing in me one more time I’m going to crack it in half!”
Yo mama is so ugly she's really the reason phone screens cracked!
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He tried to get the free cracked version of Windows 10.
Stephen Hawking tried to crack Abutu.
Are you an egg, because you crack me up?
Did you try the digital egg padlock? Because it is very easy to crack the code.
Jack and Molly are sitting in school one day.
Molly is asleep when the teacher asks her a question, "Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?"
Jack sees Molly is sleeping and quickly pokes her with a sharp pencil.
"Jesus Christ almighty!" shouts Molly.
"Correct," says the teacher.
The next day the teacher asks, "Molly, who created Heaven and Earth?"
Molly is again asleep and is poked by Jack's pencil.
"Jesus Christ almighty!" she shouts.
"Correct again," says the teacher.
The next day, for a 3rd time, Molly is asleep.
This time the teacher asks her, "What did Eve say to Adam when she had so many children?"
Jack pokes Molly with the pencil again, and this time Molly screams "If you stick that thing in me one more time I'm going to crack it in half!"
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
It didn't; it got stuck in a crack.
My eggcellent egg yolks crack everyone up.
If you don't like them, you're just hard boiled.